A Jar Of Goodbyes

A Jar Of Goodbyes

Saying see-you-soon to my boyfriend one note at a time

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There is an ocean between my boyfriend and me for the next six months.

I recently moved to London for a study abroad and internship program. Unfortunately, great opportunities often come hand-in-hand with sacrifice. I said a temporary goodbye to my serious boyfriend soon after New Year's Eve.

We've been together for four years, and we agreed that a "break" is more of Ross and Rachel's thing. We're currently working on our UK and US relations.

I wanted to leave him something tangible before he settled into Skype-dinner-dates from five hours apart. I guess we can still share a drink or two if I call him while I am at dinner and he is at brunch.

The rabbit hole that is Pinterest grew my idea to leave him what is often called a memory jar or a 365-note jar. He would probably knock himself out with a jar filled with 365 notes if I were to be away from him for that long.

At first, I thought the idea of leaving him a note for every day I'd be gone to be a cliched craft thrown together by a helpless romantic. Fortunately, the pair of us equals a romantic and a half.

I calculated that I would be abroad for around 120 days, but I added in another 30 days in case I take the long way home at the end of my program.

I started writing a bulleted list for the project on my phone and cleaned out a large honey jar for a container.

Some of my notes included memories, song ideas, motivational words, and cheesy pick-up lines. I printed all 150 notes and cut them into little slips of paper. I instructed him to open one note every morning.

My favorite series of notes in the jar is a short-story puzzle of how we met that is cut up into different notes. Each line has a number on it for him to piece together the story over the course of the six months. Of course, the last line of the story was one of the first notes he picked out!

My boyfriend said he has enjoyed how creative some of my responses were and how the process has improved his patience.

He said his favorite so far was a note that read: "Thank you for supporting me while I go to London. I know that I am sacrificing a lot to do this like I probably won't have good Mexican food for months."

Even if you see them every day, I hope you make a silly, romantic gesture for your loved ones sometime soon. Tell them you love them in person, so a jar doesn't have too.

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Happy Birthday To The Love Of My Life (Open Letter)

IDK about you... But i'm feelin' 22.
Lilo
Lilo
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Happy birthday, my darling.

The big 22. Another candle on your cake, but it's so much more than that. Another year of amazing memories, inside jokes, uncontrollable laughter, and another year getting to call you my lover.

I spent days upon days thinking about what in the world I could possibly do for you that would make this birthday amazing. I spent hours upon hours trying to figure out what in the world to get a man that gives me everything. Nothing could compare. Nothing was as sincere as me wishing you a happy day, not just today, but every day. It's simple, your happiness is my happiness.

You've taught me a lot of things, not just about life and relationships- but about myself too. I've completely opened up to you, something I never imagined to be possible. Before you came around, I was independent. I told myself that I didn't really need anyone in my life, something that I've also told to you during our relationship. I loved spending my nights alone; watching Netflix on a Friday night was the best thing ever. I was more concerned about saving my money, getting through college, and going out with friends. I never cared about what boys thought of me, chances are they weren't worth my time. I loved the idea of a relationship like in The Notebook but never really let it linger in my mind.

You came around and changed everything. You forced me to grow up as an individual and learn to look at all the angles. I learned that I really did need someone around, not just anyone, I need you. You have taught me to open up more, me, a girl who never opened up to anyone. A girl who never cared to reveal her true feelings, ideas, and goals to anyone. You have changed me in such a deep emotional way that I cannot even put into words how grateful I am to you for that. But the funny thing is, you weren't trying to do it. We were both so afraid in the beginning, terrified that one was going to hurt the other that we tried not to take anything too seriously, but we were too attracted to each other, too interested, too drawn, to let it all go. Our relationship is far from perfect. We're still learning and growing as individuals while getting over past mistakes. We're learning to trust each other, while continuing to build our relationship.

Overall: I am so lucky to have found a person like you in this crazy world, not many people are lucky in that way. I am who I am today with your help. I was already confident, goal driven, and lucky in life. I was already confident in myself, but you have made me really look at myself and learn to love the reflection that stares back at me. I was already goal driven, but you gave me more purpose and determination to reach those goals; you gave me that reason why. I was already lucky in this life, but you gave me someone to share that luck with; and create our own.

Thank you for helping me grow, thank you for making me believe in the beautiful things in life, and thank you for being who you are.

Happy birthday, my love. Here's to many more years of happiness together.
















Cover Image Credit: vsco.co
Lilo
Lilo

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Call It A Cliche, But Distance Really Does Make The Heart Grow Fonder

Love is great and all, but when you're miles away it kind of sucks.

Jgorman
Jgorman
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views

Let me be honest when I say that I did not expect to feel the way as much as I do... you're probably wondering why. I am in an amazing new place and meeting new people on the daily and lastly adventuring more than I ever have in my life. Yet for some reason, my brain always leaves me room to miss him.

Though this is a struggle that I am currently facing it has taught me that distance definitely makes the heart grown even more than I thought it could. It makes me think of all the small things that I often take for granted when I am home. Whether that means just being a 10-minute drive away from his house, or being able to spend weekends together, being so far really makes me miss the simple things.

At the same time, it makes me even more grateful that I have someone that I care so much for that even when I am miles and miles away I wish that I was with. Since I am in such an amazing place, it also makes me wish that he could visit me and that we would be able to share this experience, I don't only want it all for me as I would much rather share it with someone that I love.

Missing someone is definitely a hard part of traveling and exploring but at the same time it makes leaving a little easier because you know that you have someone waiting for you back at home. Someone that is waiting to hear all your stories and ask you all about your adventures once you finally get home for your travels. I love the experience that I am getting and know that leaving here will be very, very, hard yet at the same time the little things back home and that special someone makes it all a little bit easier.

My heart is growing every day and it understands the challenges of distance and a different time zone every day. Though nothing can get in the way of him and me...not even a different time zone.

Jgorman
Jgorman

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