To love, and to be loved, profoundly is one of the most precious expereinces of our existence. I am so lucky to say I found a pure love and treasured its existence fortwo and a half years. I am also lucky to say that I lost this pure and genuine love. Losing this extraordinary feeling led me to reflect on each individual act of love I experienced during that time. From the beginning, the small acts of love, waking up to kisses, tickles, smiles, never feeling less than beautiful each and every day, to the celebrations of anniversaries with dinner dates, flowers, holidays spent together, the new additions of family and friends; it was all very fulfilling in several aspects of my life. There were lows, as this comes with sharing your life with another, yet the way in which those lows were resolved and compromise took control allowed love to prevail more times than not.
Losing this love left me with a sense of nostalgia, but a great appreciation for the time that I held the most precious feeling known to humans. As I readjusted to life without this kind of love, another love overwhelmingly took its place. Self-love. My own well-being, my happiness, my needs, my family and my friends, my goals, my aspirations, they all became my priorities. Losing what I once held dear forced me to focus on myself entirely. I found peace within myself and became resilient in pursuing my dreams. I am so grateful to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all (Tennyson). At 21-years-old, I realized my journey of experiencing love has just begun, and as I continue my journey I am reminded that although love can hurt, love can also heal.
I am thankful for the timing of this life. There is so much beauty in loving oneself and sharing that same unconditional, healthy love with others. Some people have not had the opportunity to feel love in its most innocent form. Our generation tends to fabricate the idea of love, which can create a barricade where love becomes trapped and tainted with doubt, fear, and undeniable insecurities. Mastering the art of sharing your memories and experiences with others without becoming invested in proving your love is essential. A healthy relationship does not exist without reassurance, affection, and a continuous yearning to be committed to the person that makes loving so easy. Maintaining this balance will result in a healthy relationship that will thrive on a combination of self-love and partnered love. It all starts from within, the kind of soul searching that starts now, in your selfish years, and that carries on into your adulthood. This leads us to cherish each experience of receiving love with an open heart and allows us to give it back in return. People tend to get better when they open their hearts to love, personally I have found this to be the most rewarding. In your journey, I hope you do too.
A special thank you to my family and close friends who gave me the courage to share my most personal thoughts.