Don't Measure Your Life In Coffee Spoons

Don't Measure Your Life In Coffee Spoons

He didn’t tell me to live according to any clock or calendar, He just told me to live.
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At the end of 2016, I wrote a long letter to myself about everything that happened that year. I recorded everything that took place, in detail, from that year. Since then, every end of the year I’ve written a page or two on what events took place. I turn twenty years old this week and I'm realizing that I don’t want to measure my life in years. I don’t want to live according to months and weeks. I don’t want to live thinking, “today is Wednesday, the week is almost over, I should be in a good mood by then.”

I don’t want to be like J. Alfred Prufrock when he complains, “For I have known them all already, known them all: Have known the evenings, mornings, afternoons, I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.” I like coffee, but to measure my life by the number of days I’m alive is so dull and monotonous. Of course in T.S. Eliot’s poem, there exists a man who has many complaints about the life in which he lives. I don’t compare my thoughts entirely with his. However, I do find myself sometimes focusing too much on things that don’t deserve my undivided attention. I compartmentalize my life into work shifts, class periods, time to study, exercise time, etc.

I take the days for granted. I forget the people I once knew that won’t see the sun rise and fall today. I forget to be grateful for the life I’ve been given. I forget to remember verses like 1 Timothy 2:5-6, “For, there is one God and one Mediator who can reconcile God and humanity—the man Christ Jesus. He gave his life to purchase freedom for everyone. This is the message God gave to the world at just the right time.”

I forget that I answer to Jesus. My plans are nothing because what do I really have control over in this life anyway? Hebrews 12:1-2 says, “Therefore since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.”

I’m not going to measure my life in coffee spoons, I won’t divide my life into years. Like the wind, I'll go along with the time as it flows from day to day like the breeze, hour to hour like the waves. Because He didn’t tell me to live according to any clock or calendar, He just told me to live.






Cover Image Credit: https://pixabay.com/en/beach-pacific-coastline-ocean-coast-2089936/

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22 New Things That I Want To Try Now That I'm 22

A bucket list for my 22nd year.

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"I don't know about you but I'm feelin' 22," I have waited 6 long years to sing that and actually be 22! Now 22 doesn't seem like a big deal to people because you can't do anything that you couldn't do before and you're still super young. But I'm determined to make my 22nd year a year filled with new adventures and new experiences. So here's to 22.

1. Go sky diving.

What's crazier than jumping out of a plane? (Although I'll probably try indoor skydiving first.)

2. Go cliff jumping/diving.

I must be the only Rhode Islander who hasn't gone to Jamestown and jumped off a cliff.

3. Ride in a hor air balloon.

Up, up and away.

4. Try out skiing.

Cash me in the next Olympics, how bout dat.

5. Try out snow boarding.

Shawn White, I'm coming for you.

6. Go bungee jumping.

Because at least this time I'll be attached to something.

7. Go to Portugal.

I mean I'm Portuguese so I have to go at some point, right?

8. Go to Cape Verde.

Once again, I'm Cape Verdean so I have to go.

9. Vist one of the seven wonders of the world.

I mean hey, Egypt's on, my bucket list.

10. Try out surfing.

It's only natural that somebody from the Ocean State knows how to surf.

11. Learn a new langauge.

Because my little bit of Portuguese, Spanish and Latin isn't cutting it anymore.

12. Travel to a state that I've never been to before.

Fun fact: I've only been to 17 of the 50 states.

13. Go paddle boarding.

Pretty boring but I've never done it.

14. Go scuba diving.

I'm from the Ocean State so I guess I should see the ocean up close and personal.

15. Learn how to line dance.

There's actually a barn in my state that does line dancing, so this one will definitely get crossed off.

16. Go kayaking.

All this water around me and I haven't done a lot of the water activites.

17. Stay the night in a haunted hotel room.

I bet if I got my friends to come with me, it would be like the Suite Life of Zach and Cody episode, minus the ghost coming out of the wall but you never know.

18. Get my palms read.

Because who doesn't want to know their future.

19. Go to a medium.

Like a medium that can communicate with people that have died.

20. Take a helicopter ride.

Air plane: check Helicopter:....

21. Sleep under the stars.

Because sleeping in a tent is more like glamping than camping

22. Just to try new things in my everyday life.

Whether it's trying a new restaurant, getting something different at my usual restaurants, changing my usual style, going on the scary rides at amusement parks, and bringing things I used to do back into my life now.

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We Can't Plan Our Lives And That Doesn't have To Be A Bad Thing

It puts into perspective how very little control we have on this planet.

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Life will wreck your plans, every time, and I'm not really sure that's a bad thing. I think it just puts into perspective how very little control we have on this planet, and that's humbling.

I'm learning a lot right now about letting go. Having little idea of what I'm going to do after college or down the road can feel really daunting at times, but it's also forcing me to hold my heart in the peace of certain truths I know.

Truth #1: Nothing you ever do, or don't do, can affect your value. I believe in God, and His promises and the rooting I've found in Him destroy all other theories of my worth. You might not believe that. Regardless, I hope you know you're priceless. If we claim to care for humanity, I believe we have to also acknowledge that nobody could possibly have any more value than anyone else. Let's not commodify ourselves. There is freedom in rejecting the notion that you have to be a certain person to be valuable.

Truth #2: There is beauty in faithfully walking into the unknown.

Truth #3: Life is scary, but we've made it through a lot of scary stuff so far, and we can do it again.

Truth #4: The world is a very broken place, and the longer I sit in inaction, the more I know we have to do something.

Truth #5: Boundaries are important. Although I am put on this earth to create further goodness and spread further light, I can't do it all. I have to learn to live within the tension of being human and being created to give of myself to the world. Sitting in the now with uncertainty of the future allows me time to consider the kind of boundaries I want to retain in order to protect my heart from the trying times that are sure to continue coming.

Truth #6: Although sometimes I feel like I'm stuck because I can't plan the future, I'm learning. Every single day. I'm constantly being grown, challenged, and opened. The idea that we can be "stuck"... is kind of a lie. Every moment, every event, every experience is important. We just have to remain open to being changed.

Truth #7: The unexpected does not have to be negative. Surprises, and even obstacles, do not have to be received with stress or anxiety. We never know what is coming— if we approach and receive the things that happen to us unexpectedly with hope and positivity, stress and anxiety have a much weaker grip. Grief is necessary, and disappointment is human; mental battles are not easily fought. But we can fight. And we can hope. And we can be positive even through immense amounts of pain.

Truth #8: Sometimes the days with no plan are the very best.

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