School can be difficult.

It can put a lot of stress on your back. It can sometimes feel like there is a weight that hasn’t been lifted off when you have demanding works to do. Many of my friends, including me, to a certain point, give up hobbies for school. I see myself giving up friends, saying no to invites to hang out. I see myself choose to not call my family back home when the day seems hectic. I put school first.

I prioritize school. Sometimes I put it above anything else. When I did not do well in class, I hit myself hard. I blame myself for my failure in a test. I say harsh words to myself. I beat myself up with criticizing and wishing that I did not let that happen.

One day, on finals week, I was talking to my friend who always studies hard for her classes. However, that day she gave up. She did not want to study. She explained to me that she did not want to study because her class could drop one test and she did not want to bother stressing out when she knew that she will get a bad grade.

I knew she had potential. I believe she was not 100% sure that she would get a bad grade. But she just gave up. I am tearing apart because knowing the most dedicated person I’ve ever met in my life gave up working because she was too stressed to study, scared of how her GPA will hit her self-esteem. Also, the fact that no one would suffer with me to study for finals week.

Grades most often dictate how you see yourself. You unconsciously judge yourself through a number from your transcript.

Grades put off your favorite things to do. You neglect your responsibility to take care of yourself. You forgot there are things you have to do to increase your sense well being. You would not even bother to pick up that phone or say yes to those invites.

You know it is wrong. It is wrong to not let loose and enjoy the sunshine on Saturday morning. It is wrong to isolate yourself with a work-book accompanying you. It is wrong to put yourself down for failure.

“Take it easy on yourself,” That is what I say to myself every time I put myself in this situation where I had to study for an extended amount of hours. I know grades are important but also your well-being is. I think as long as you do your best, be confident, and trust your instinct on the test, you will do just fine. Just don’t give up just yet. I know you can do it.

Your GPA matters but you matter way more than that grade point average.