When you first meet someone and you start to develop feelings for them, it is natural to want to spend all of your time with them. It seems like this person understands you like no other, and there is never a dull moment between the two of you. Finding love is a beautiful thing, and can change your entire life for the best when you meet the right person.
But what happens when you allow that person to become the center of your happiness? The ONLY reason why you are happy. You begin to neglect your family and friends all for the sake of making that person happy. You feel incomplete when you're not with them, and can't get anything done because you are constantly thinking about them. You keep eyeballing your phone because you don't want them to think you are ignoring their text/phone call. Sooner or later, without realizing it, you've completely changed, and somewhere along the way realize that you don't know who you are anymore.
It is very easy to lose yourself when you are in a long term relationship. Here are some tips on how you can still maintain your individuality while you are dating someone.
1. Don't stop doing the things that make YOU happy.
This may include a hobby, studying, exercising, etc... whatever it is you do that makes you feel whole and like you have a purpose in the world. When you spend a lot of your time with someone else, it is very easy to neglect these hobbies because you are now doing almost everything as a couple. If you are with the right person, they will completely support your growth and happiness, and NOT make you feel guilty about trying to do certain things on your own.
2. Always keep friends and family close.
These are the people who have helped shape you into the person you are today. When you spend a lot of your time with someone else, it is inevitable that you will begin to take on a few of their qualities and mannerisms. Being around friends and family can remind you of the beautiful qualities that you possess and all of the things that you have to offer.
3. Know your worth.
It's finally happened. You've found someone who thinks you are beautiful. Someone who seems to care for you deeply. Growing up, maybe you didn't receive a lot of attention, and now that you have it from someone special, you don't plan on letting it go. The problem with this is that you've put your self-worth in someone else's hands. You have become so dependent on them telling you that you are beautiful, that you allow them to get away with saying and doing things that deep down, you know are not right.
When you know your worth, you will learn to recognize when you aren't being treated as you should. Don't ever allow someone to get comfortable with disrespecting you, because chances are it will only get worse. They have come to believe that they can get away with anything because YOU will accept it.
4. Be Yourself
Ask yourself if the person you are with truly accepts you. You should feel comfortable talking to, and sharing your thoughts and feelings with your significant other... No matter how crazy they might seem. You should never feel judged or as though you are not good enough.
Remember that you do not NEED a person to be happy. Be with them because you WANT to. If you feel like you've lost yourself in a relationship, it is okay to take a step back and reflect on the things you'd like to change. A person who truly loves you and cares about your well being will understand the importance of maintaining ones individuality in a relationship. A person should never be the source of your happiness... they should merely add to it.
