One would think that with cell phones and smart phones, the Internet, and a growing amount of social media networks, it would be easier than ever to stay close with all those friends from home throughout the college years. In some ways, this may be true. I can FaceTime my with best friend in South Carolina whenever I want, and my friend in Baltimore is really just a quick text message or phone call away. But the speed at which I can talk to my friends does not change the fact that we are all very busy with school work, clubs, and college friends. Despite the ease with which people are able to contact one another, people can drift apart just as easily as ever.
As the months pass in your first year of college and beyond, it’s important to remember to reach out to all the people you still want to be a part of your life. It can be as easy as sending a, “How is everything?” text message, making a quick phone call between classes to check in, or even sending a care package on a friend’s birthday full of their favorite snacks. Any way to let your friends know that you are thinking of them will keep you close despite the distance. Talking to your friends and staying updated on their lives is also important. Having someone to talk to about stress, homesickness, or problems with guys and other friends, and being a listening ear for their troubles in return will keep long distance friendships strong and make it feel as if you were never apart once you are finally reunited.
It is also important to take note of friends who aren’t reciprocating or don’t respond enthusiastically to your reaching out. Staying connected to friends while at school should not be a one-way street, and if you feel like you are being ignored or forgotten, it may be time to take a step back and decide whether this person is really a friend worth keeping and reaching out to. Most of all, know when to let go. I, like many others, have been guilty of working too hard to keep friends who seemed disinterested in keeping me. While it can be hard to close the book on a friendship, surrounding yourself with people who value and appreciate you is the real priority. Remind yourself that the friends who are meant to be in your life will always find their way back.
It is said that the people we know are either blessings or lessons, but some are both. Letting go of friends from home who you probably once called a “best friend forever” can be sad, but it can also create strength and maturity by reminding you to value yourself and to choose friends who value you just as much. In the end, if you can come out of college with just a small handful of close home friends who love you and inspire you to be better, you have fared very well.
