My sister recently got married and it was easily the best day of my life. I was privileged enough to be chosen as her maid of honor, my other sister being assigned matron of honor, and it was so much fun. This was my first time taking on the responsibility, but it taught me a lot about weddings, my relationship with my sister, and how to do it in the future if I'm ever asked again! I think i did an okay job, so here are the things I did throughout the planning process, and that you should do too in order to be a good maid of honor:
1. Help your bride look at venues
Luckily for me, my sister got engaged over winter break last year, so I was around for a lot of the early planning. She decided what color scheme she wanted and we got to tour many, many, many venues. I love weddings and crap like this so I was living for it. You have to make sure you catch some things your bride doesn't. Make sure you ask questions she may have forgotten and don't give your opinion unless it's asked for; it's her wedding, not yours.
2. Go with her to try on dresses
This was my favorite part of planning. You get to watch your sister, or bestie, try on dresses for the day she has been waiting for since she was a little girl. The fluff of the dresses and walking into a huge room full of them is so fun and whimsical I can't really explain it. Of course, you'll think she looks amazing in everything she tries on, but when she puts on "THE dress" - it is a feeling unlike any other. So much happiness.
3. Help mediate arguments
When planning a wedding, there is bound to be some arguments. How many people should be invited, what the theme is, when to book the hotel, what flowers to get, etc. There are a lot of decisions to be made, so naturally, there are fights to be had. Take your bride's side, but also don't forget to have her best interest at heart by hearing all sides. Ultimately, do what you need to do to keep your bride sane and happy.
4. Plan a killer bachelorette party
This all depends on the kind of bride! Some women want spa days or vacation weekends. Some like drag shows and fancy brunch! I know my sister did! What's important is that all the women she wants there are there, that everyone is having a good time, and that everyone is safe. You also don't want it to be tooooo expensive, people still have wedding gifts to get remember!
5. Be there- both emotionally and physically
Getting married is a big deal. It's a big commitment and the process of planning a wedding does not help distract you from the fact that you are making a huge life decision/change, in fact, it only stresses you out more! Obviously getting married is also a fun, joyful, time, but as a maid of honor, you need to be there for all of it. Be there in the early days of engagement when your bride is super pumped, and be there when she's pissed about dress alterations!
6. Organize an amazing bridal shower
We made my sister's a Harry Potter themed shower! It was special to surprise her with a fun, quirky, theme. The day is filled with gifts, and love, and games. Make sure everything is organized, and you keep the gifts moving to make it a pleasurable experience for everyone.
7. Learn how to bustle her dress... this is very important
We may have had some trouble...This took longer than we expected and I have never done this before, so I thought it was going to be easy, but oh no. Make sure you are prepared for this so you and your bride can get out to mingle with as soon as possible! She's the woman of the hour everyone wants to say hey and congratulate her!
8. Write a great speech
Don't be the dummy who doesn't write something until the night of the rehearsal! You are important enough to them that they want you to be apart of one of the most important days of their life, so don't mess up the speech in front of literally everyone they know and love. My other sister and I worked on ours for forever to make it absolutely perfect. Make it funny if you wish, but keep it mushy too!
9. Know your responsibilities for the day of the wedding!
Luckily, my sister is quite organized and made this very clear to me. God bless her. You don't want to be the person in the bridal party who doesn't know what the heck is going on.
10. Do anything you can to help her have the best day of her life
Basically, the whole point of this article is to advise you to be a good person while taking care of your bride. She asks you to get her a drink - do it. She asks for your opinion on your bridesmaids' dresses - give it. She needs you to entertain some of her in-laws - do it. She needs you to come with her to taste the cake - go!