There’s always one person that loves so much harder than the other people in their lives. I often happen to be that person. Loving too much, too hard, can hurt in ways you didn’t know it could. But that doesn't mean you should give up on the people you love, and that love you in return.
You would do anything for your people. Often times, you drop everything when people need you to. You would give anything to make sure that the people around you are happy. Even if that means you aren’t. In a way, you’re the mom of the group. You just want the best for everyone. If that means putting off a paper to help a friend through a fight with his or her significant other, you’ll do it. Because their feelings are more important to you than your own.
In return though, they don’t do everything for you. When you text them telling them you’ve had a bad day, they don’t respond. You just want everyone around you to give you the same priority you give them. Isn’t that the golden rule? Treat others the way you want to be treated, right? Apparently not. You try and give your people so much to make sure they’re happy, healthy, and safe but you don’t get the same treatment. You begin to feel disappointed, and the feeling becomes your norm. You begin to feel bitter and cheated. Why should you drown for people that won’t even put a toe in the water for you?
As a result, you push people away. You exclude yourself from group events. This doesn’t help your feelings. Don’t push your friends away. You may not get the same treatment you give them, but they do still love you. Trust me, you have friends because they enjoy your company. You just love a little bit more than they do. There’s nothing wrong with that.
Eventually, you give away so much of yourself that you’re not really sure what’s left. So maybe it's time to start loving yourself as hard as you love everyone around you. If you love yourself as much as you love other people, you won’t be disappointed. You won’t have to worry about who you get close to, who you give parts of yourself to. You’ll know you’re loved regardless of the people around you. Depending on the love and validation from others to prove that you’re a good friend, sibling, child, overall person, just makes you more bitter. If you’re going to love someone too hard, make sure it is yourself. There’s only so much that others can do for you. You can only do so much for others. Loving too hard can hurt, but maybe it is because you’re not loving the right person too hard.
