Let me start off by saying this, you could call me the average teenage girl. Some may even say basic, if you will. I love coffee, wear Uggs and follow celebrities on Instagram who are totally #goals. Now that that's out there, I also have days where I feel like a total garbage bag and some days where I feel like the fiercest girl out there. So there you have it, I am a pretty average human being with feelings about myself.
There I was in all my basic glory when both my roommates told me they were going to be gone for the weekend. What? What was I possibly going to do? They have been my security blanket all throughout my first year of college, to say the least. At this point I decided I would spend the entire weekend dedicated to myself, which made sense since I would be alone all weekend!
Recently though oI feel like I am constantly reading things about being "real" and "loving yourself". Everyone is really good at talking themselves up and yes even talking about how much they love themselves. But we don't really make it publicly known when we don't like something about yourself. Not feeling good isn't trendy (and why should it be?) so we don't talk about it. Publicly, it is hardly addressed.
Since we are being honest though, sometimes it actually takes a conscious effort to be good to yourself, and because I am human it took a conscious effort for me to love myself for an entire weekend! No, not all of my insecurities melted away in one weekend, but I did spend an entire weekend loving myself and this is what I learned:
1. Loving yourself can actually be really fun!
Every time I read yet another article about loving yourself, I get exhausted! Sometimes these articles are selling products and sometimes they're just selling mindfulness but when other people tell me I have to do something it just feels like work and I don't like that so much. And when people on the internet tell me to feel things, I usually just end up shouting at my computer screen in retaliation because I am #independent. But instead of it being a chore to love myself, I was nice to my body and nice to my mind just as I would be to someone I loved and it was fun!
2. Screw The Rules!
Yes, screw the rules. All of them. Every single one. Goodbye. I am a people pleaser. I love other people loving me. I love doing the right thing. But since this weekend was about ME, all rules went out the window! Is it socially acceptable to stay in on a Friday night while at college? Nah, not really but I did it anyways and felt no guilt and no shame. Am I really supposed to eat a bag of chips for dinner? No, but I did because I wanted to and instead of shaming myself about it or doing all these things I don't want to I just did what I wanted! Then the next day I spent time with friends and interacted with human beings. I also ate some fruits and veggies. (Read: Dad I'm being healthy...see!
3. Treat yourself like you would treat someone else you love.
Really I didn't even know where to start with this whole loving myself thing. But once I came up with this idea that Oh! I treat myself like I would want to treat others that I love! it became super easy to just do things for me. Often times we are our harshest critic, especially us perfectionist. I still hold stuff I did 3 years ago against myself sometimes, but someone else would do something to me and I would be the one apologizing. (I think thats what they like to call a pushover.) With this one though, judgement pretty much went out the door. I still held myself to a certain standard, but if I wasn't perfect (which is always) it wasn't such a big deal because I love myself!
So the weekend is over and sometimes I still feel like a garbage bag. I still have human feelings, but I know I can love myself without it being a chore! It was actually really fun to spend some time trying to please me and care about me instead of everyone else. So next time you're feeling bad or insecure or anything other than amazing, spend some time on yourself! Do something that will make you happy! It is worth it, even if you just spend 10 minutes dedicated to yourself, self love isn't so bad. And the days you feel crappy thats okay too!
Moral of the story: We're all human and we have feelings that can be good, bad and other. Just don't forget to give yourself some dang TLC every now and then because you deserve it.
