As a seventeen-year-old fat girl, it's a challenge to comprehend self-love. In a culture where the primary voices and representatives are thin, busty models it is simple to question what is wrong with you. Needless to say, there is nothing inherently wrong with any of us, whether it's a lazy eye or a bad nose job. The lack of representation in the media and the uprising of the body positivity trend is changing how I see myself and women alike.
Now, I'm going to discuss representation and newfound trends in the media in a future article. For now, this is about how I am finding to love myself.
As stated previously I am seventeen and fat. I don't take fat offensively because I've learned that we, as a society, have gifted the word "fat" with a negative connotation. I've learned how to embrace my body shape. I have thick thighs, and although that package does not include an assumed fat ass, I've accepted that. It's hard enough to find a pair that fits my wide hips. Why have more complications finding clothes?
Evolving as the tallest, widest, and loudest child made my childhood difficult. I was nicknamed as Giant by many in elementary school. I think they were jealous because I was wearing a training bra and shaving at nine. People wouldn't hang out with me because they thought I was a high school student in a six-grade class. I was tormented for being ugly and big, but my peers mainly targeted my height. Listen, Smurf. Being tall is great! Not only do I have the advantage at concerts, but I was eligible to ride every rollercoaster at Yorks Wild Animal Kingdom by the time I was seven years old. You all on the Water Baby Bumper Boats while I was being an adult? I took the comments personally for years. I cried consistently over being insulted in elementary school and middle school. Let me tell you, it was a waste of time.
I'm going to tell you why it's a waste of time to cry over those who are rude. You're always going to be told that they're jealous or insecure. But you know what? That doesn't mean you can't stand up for yourself or accept the fact that it's happening. Do me a favor, don't fight back but instead be snarky. For example, Tiny Tina walks up to you and says you're fat. Look at Tiny Tina and tell them you have a mirror and it says for them to get a nose job. We all have insecurities.
This is where I give you advice that I gave myself.
1. Don't listen to what others say about you. It doesn't matter.
2. Eat what you want but don't damage your heart, okay?
3. Wear clothes that make you feel confident and fit you. I'm tall, have a flat ass, and a large stomach. If they don't fit properly, you're going to feel like everyone is staring at you.
4. Get an excellent haircut. I had horrible hair for years, don't make that mistake.
5. Surround yourself with supportive figures in your life. If your family thinks you need to lose weight or your friends tell you that it's time to hit the treadmill, drop them. You don't hit a treadmill, you run on it until you go unconscious.
6. Motivate yourself. Have no one? You'll always have yourself.
7. Always always ALWAYS remember that you do everything for yourself and not for anyone else.
I followed all of these steps and although I have ways to go before every aspect of myself is loved by myself, it will happen.