I Found Self Love and You Can Too

I Found Self Love and You Can Too

From growing up heavy, living in a pro-thin society, to being "too tall" I coped with it all.
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As a seventeen-year-old fat girl, it's a challenge to comprehend self-love. In a culture where the primary voices and representatives are thin, busty models it is simple to question what is wrong with you. Needless to say, there is nothing inherently wrong with any of us, whether it's a lazy eye or a bad nose job. The lack of representation in the media and the uprising of the body positivity trend is changing how I see myself and women alike.

Now, I'm going to discuss representation and newfound trends in the media in a future article. For now, this is about how I am finding to love myself.

As stated previously I am seventeen and fat. I don't take fat offensively because I've learned that we, as a society, have gifted the word "fat" with a negative connotation. I've learned how to embrace my body shape. I have thick thighs, and although that package does not include an assumed fat ass, I've accepted that. It's hard enough to find a pair that fits my wide hips. Why have more complications finding clothes?

Evolving as the tallest, widest, and loudest child made my childhood difficult. I was nicknamed as Giant by many in elementary school. I think they were jealous because I was wearing a training bra and shaving at nine. People wouldn't hang out with me because they thought I was a high school student in a six-grade class. I was tormented for being ugly and big, but my peers mainly targeted my height. Listen, Smurf. Being tall is great! Not only do I have the advantage at concerts, but I was eligible to ride every rollercoaster at Yorks Wild Animal Kingdom by the time I was seven years old. You all on the Water Baby Bumper Boats while I was being an adult? I took the comments personally for years. I cried consistently over being insulted in elementary school and middle school. Let me tell you, it was a waste of time.

I'm going to tell you why it's a waste of time to cry over those who are rude. You're always going to be told that they're jealous or insecure. But you know what? That doesn't mean you can't stand up for yourself or accept the fact that it's happening. Do me a favor, don't fight back but instead be snarky. For example, Tiny Tina walks up to you and says you're fat. Look at Tiny Tina and tell them you have a mirror and it says for them to get a nose job. We all have insecurities.

This is where I give you advice that I gave myself.

1. Don't listen to what others say about you. It doesn't matter.

2. Eat what you want but don't damage your heart, okay?

3. Wear clothes that make you feel confident and fit you. I'm tall, have a flat ass, and a large stomach. If they don't fit properly, you're going to feel like everyone is staring at you.

4. Get an excellent haircut. I had horrible hair for years, don't make that mistake.

5. Surround yourself with supportive figures in your life. If your family thinks you need to lose weight or your friends tell you that it's time to hit the treadmill, drop them. You don't hit a treadmill, you run on it until you go unconscious.

6. Motivate yourself. Have no one? You'll always have yourself.

7. Always always ALWAYS remember that you do everything for yourself and not for anyone else.

I followed all of these steps and although I have ways to go before every aspect of myself is loved by myself, it will happen.

Stay pure.

Cover Image Credit: Pixabay

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5 Perks Of Having A Long-Distance Best Friend

The best kind of long-distance relationship.
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Sometimes, people get annoyed when girls refer to multiple people as their "best friend," but they don't understand. We have different types of best friends. There's the going out together best friend, the see each other everyday best friend and the constant, low maintenance best friend.

While I'm lucky enough to have two out of the three at the same school as me, my "low maintenance" best friend goes to college six hours from Baton Rouge.

This type of friend is special because no matter how long you go without talking or seeing each other, you're always insanely close. Even though I miss her daily, having a long-distance best friend has its perks. Here are just a few of them...

1. Getting to see each other is a special event.

Sometimes when you see someone all the time, you take that person and their friendship for granted. When you don't get to see one of your favorite people very often, the times when you're together are truly appreciated.

2. You always have someone to give unbiased advice.

This person knows you best, but they probably don't know the people you're telling them about, so they can give you better advice than anyone else.

3. You always have someone to text and FaceTime.

While there may be hundreds of miles between you, they're also just a phone call away. You know they'll always be there for you even when they can't physically be there.

4. You can plan fun trips to visit each other.

When you can visit each other, you get to meet the people you've heard so much about and experience all the places they love. You get to have your own college experience and, sometimes, theirs, too.

5. You know they will always be a part of your life.

If you can survive going to school in different states, you've both proven that your friendship will last forever. You both care enough to make time for the other in the midst of exams, social events, and homework.

The long-distance best friend is a forever friend. While I wish I could see mine more, I wouldn't trade her for anything.

Cover Image Credit: Just For Laughs-Chicago

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You Don't Need A 'Bikini Body' To Fully Love Yourself This Summer

You don't need to be stick-thin to feel good about your body.

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One of my favorite quotes of all time is, "Comparison is the thief of joy." Want to know why? Because it's true.

I could look in the mirror one day and feel totally confident about myself. Then I'll see a post on Instagram of some beautiful girl, feel awful, and wonder why I don't look like that. But there's a reason I don't look like that — because I'm me, not them.

The fact of the matter is that we need to love ourselves for who we are. We need to stop comparing our beauty to that of others. We are all our own people and we should feel confident in our beauty.

Bikini season is a major source of struggle for me and many others. Everyone is lounging on the beach in bikinis and you feel like you just want to hide under your towel. Every other photo on your social media is a super skinny girl from high school showing off her body. You will NEVER see a photo of me in a bikini on social media because I'm simply not comfortable in my body enough to show it off like that. I have always wished that I was, but at the same time, that's not who I am.

You don't need to be stick thin to feel good about your body. Every body is beautiful, and we need to embrace that. If we constantly look to others as a source of comparison, we will literally never be happy in our own skin.

Bikini season is tough as it is, don't make it tougher on yourself by allowing your mind to take over. Enjoy your spring break, enjoy your summer, enjoy your life. You deserve it. You deserve happiness.

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