To Stay In Love When You Are Apart

To Stay In Love When You Are Apart

I do it because I want to.
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When we began dating we were just in high school, both with unstable views of where life will take us in 10 years. Both with goals. We knew where we were going after high school, but what about life thereafter?

When we decided to date, I was not only dating you but I basically was in a relationship with the Army too. Why? Because where you go, I follow. I always have people question me about why I do it. Why stick with someone when you know they are soon to be deployed for God knows how long? How do you handle the fact that there is always a chance he may not come home to you? How do you deal with the times of no communication? My answer: because I love him.

In the basic sense, I love him is the answer I give to people even though the truth is that it goes even deeper. I don't do it because I have to, I do it because I want to. I do it because our love only grows stronger.

This weekend I was blessed. I got to see my man. Our time apart can get to us sometimes, making us frustrated but we then remind each other that we will see eachother eventually and its that thought that keeps us sane.

One thing I have learned from this type of relationship is that you need to get used to the plans chagning because you never know anything or what going on. For example, he was shipped to his unit and they tell you the day you leave or if youre lucky, the day before. Each week would would stay hopefuly that maybe, just mayb he would ship out and we could see eachother. Next thing we knew, over a month went by and a month is not a long time to be apart however we missed eachother deeply.

He fianlly shipped and was able to visit me, and I couldnt be more happy. This relationship has taught me to appreciate every little thing and never take for granted what God gives you because some people never find their person and to know I have mine at 18, well that just makes life that much better.

Cover Image Credit: Kathryn Crenshaw

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I Have No Label

Labels aren't for everyone, and I'm one of them.

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There's a huge pressure from society for people to know things about themselves—what they want to do with their life, what career they want to be tethered to, where they plan on being five years from now—that we really shouldn't add more pressure by requiring people to know their sexual orientation and gender identity.

I've always been pretty comfortable with my gender, but my sexuality? I'm still figuring that one out. I grew up in a fairly conservative home, so I was never exposed to the LGBT+ community or anything similar to it. Straight was the only way to go, and I grew up completely fine with that. It's only now that I know I'm not, that I'm realizing some of the things I did, probably should have told me I wasn't sooner.

Thankfully, it was never a huge source of stress for me because I was OK with being straight. I was fine with the idea of only being into men because I mostly still am. It's just that "mostly" bit that has me thrown off.

If I'm not fully into just guys, does that make me bisexual? What's the full difference between them, anyway? What does "bi" really imply, anyway? Two? Which two? Does the "bi" aspect of the word "bisexual" even really matter?

Do people identify as "pansexual" because the distinction of "bi" is misleading since there are more than just two genders?

Speaking of genders, would I date someone whose gender identity doesn't conform to the binary? How about a transgender person? How can I really know this for a fact without dating someone like that?

All of these thoughts gave me countless headaches, and they still do if I think too hard about it. Since I'm still discovering myself, I'm not fully comfortable labeling my sexuality as anything other than "not straight."

That should be totally fine.

If anything, I think this should be encouraged. It puts way less stress on people who are already stressed beyond belief. It shouldn't be something that a person has to know immediately, and they shouldn't have to ever label themselves if they aren't comfortable with it.

Let people explore their sexuality and gender. If they find a label early, let them. They may change it later. They may not. As long as they're happy with it, what does it matter? Why tell them "no?" Even if you're their parent or caregiver, you should at least be fine with them exploring their own identity and figuring their life out.

It's healthy, and ultimately, it will make them a happier person to know they had support for the whole wild ride.

Respect people if they find nothing and choose to stay label-less.

Cover Image Credit:

c1.staticflickr.com

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Ladies, Stop Waiting For Love And Learn About Yourself For A Little While

Keep growing and believing in yourself, honey.

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This one is for all of those ladies out there that are waiting.

Yes, I said waiting.

Are you waiting for that guy in your class to just ask for your number already?

Are you hoping the guy at the coffee shop you see everyday asks you out on a date?

Are you waiting and dreaming up every situation that could possibly happen when you meet your special someone?

You're waiting for that special someone to come find you. You've thought up every fantasy and cute little way you're just going to "run into" the one soon.

I am too. I'm not going to lie.

I literally sit in my car or at my desk or lay in bed and just dream about how my love life will somehow happen in the blink of an eye. Because, ya know, I've just never been the one to dream of being #foreveralone. Yeah, I know that isn't a thing anymore but oh is it ever so relevant.

I am right there with you!!

BUT I am here to tell you to STOP.

Be patient. You are still young and have so much to learn about yourself.

I do the same thing. I sit there on social media, watching couples my age get engaged or have babies or just have such a perfect relationship every single day.

I let it get under my skin. I let it tell me that I am not enough for a relationship. I let it get to me a lot more than people think.

But I have come to the realization that it will take its time and I will learn patience. I will take time for myself. I will create a whole new world and just live to grow myself physically, emotionally, mentally, faithfully and in every aspect of my life.

Once you start to spend more time with yourself, you develop a love for yourself. and after a while, being alone doesn't scare you.

God has a special plan for each and every one of us. So why rush it? God knows exactly what He's doing.

If you need it, here's the biggest reminder that I constantly am telling myself: God's plan is greater than yours or one you could ever dream of. Everything happens for a reason because it's all a part of HIS plan. NOT yours. God's love is greater. And until He leads you to your better half, keep praying and loving the Lord. He will lead you in the right direction. He has never failed you, why would He start now?!

Keep growing and believing in yourself, honey.

I promise the wait will be worth it!!

Xoxo,

Meg

Cover Image Credit:

Megan Sutton

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