We all communicate our love differently and that's our love language.
According to Dr. Gary Chapman's "The Five Love Languages," there are five ways to express love: physical touch, gifts, words of affirmation, acts of service, and quality time. Whether you're in a committed relationship or single as a pringle, if you don't know what your primary love language is, take this quiz and gain some insight into who you are and what you need to feel loved.
For myself, I've definitely felt my love language clashed with my partners' in past relationships. My love language expectations are crushed and I start to question their feelings for me. That's probably why I got so excited when both my current boyfriend and I got the same exact results from the test. No joke – there was no cheating involved, pinky swear.
Relationships aren't easy, but it's important to keep the flame alive. To do so, you and your partner have to be on the same page and proper communication is key. This includes talking and listening in ways that are easily digestible by your loved one.
Sometimes life gets in the way and telling someone you love them gets pushed aside. I'm right there with you, I have fallen comfortable with my boyfriend and forgotten to say how proud of and head over heels I am for him. This is why it's so important to recognize these hiccups and come back to doing the little things "just because."
Once you figure out your love language, here's exactly what it says about you:
If physical touch is your primary language, then sparks fly when you hold hands, smooch, and roll in the sheets with your S.O. This doesn't mean you're sex-obsessed or can't get away from your naughty thoughts. You're simply someone who appreciates intimacy and is warmed when your lover lays a kiss on your forehead or places their hand on top of yours. You need this sense of touch to be reminded they are there for you.
Take a deep breath, you're not materialistic! Not all gifts have to be someone's entire paycheck. You like to be reassured that your loved one was thinking of you and a gift that says, "I love you" is a perfect reminder. When your partner goes on vacation without you and comes back with a gift that reminds them of you, your heart falls in love all over again. The way you understand love is through small gestures that mean more than anything.
Words of Affirmation
We're talking genuine, verbal communication. You're not needy and you don't have bad self-esteem, you just need to hear you are appreciated, you are beautiful, and you can do it. You aren't a fan of passive aggressiveness and sarcasm, so the way these words are said influences how you understand them.
Acts of Service
You're a busy bee, you've got a ton on your plate, you just need a break, and you're all for the saying, "Show don't tell." So, when your special someone goes out of their way to take out the garbage or grab take-out on the way home, you know love is in the air.
I'm in a long-distance relationship and I'm guessing the time apart has shaped my love language because quality time is my main form of expression. If you love quality time as much as I do, you need undivided attention from your partner. That means phones down, it's just you and them. Maybe it's a 5-minute chat before bed, taking the dog for a walk together, or just talking about one another's days during dinner.
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