Love and pain is one and the same, although many times we think they go together like oil and water. Relationships have become the holy grail of our modern day because it's the one thing everyone is looking for.

Sometimes people mistake love as being some perfect phenomena. Love never comes without pain. Whether the one you love means to hurt you are not they will somehow, eventually. When you love someone you put your trust in them and hold them to a higher standard and we as humans are imperfect. So, naturally we are let down because nobody can live up to every single expectation everyone has for them. However, pain can help us.

I have experienced love with a great deal of pain and I have also experienced love with little pain. The love I experienced with greater pain taught me much more about myself and life than the one with lesser pain. The love with greater pain molded me into a person with a much stronger character able to handle situations with more wisdom.

Think about your parents and all the stuff we put them through without even realizing it. Some of the most painful times with our parents were some of the best times in terms of shaping our character. The relationships with our parents are probably the strongest relationship many of us have. No one can get under your skin like your parents can and vice versa.

My dad and I had many disagreements. There were many times I didn't listen when he told me to do things or better yet, not to do things. My dad cared for me so much that when I wasn't living up to his expectations he was hurt. However, just because he was hurt or disappointed didn't mean he didn't love me still. It worked the other way as well. There were times I thought my dad was just out to get me and I was hurt but really he was just looking out for me. Both my dad and I are stronger and wiser because of this.

The same goes for friendships. Think about the truest friend you have had. There were probably times where the other messed up and maybe hurt the other one but you worked it out because you care for them. You didn't just stop trying to be their friend.

This is how romantic relationships should be too. It is not about keeping a list of the wrongs and rights the other has done. It is about helping them not make the wrongs because that is the point of love that is unconditional. You do not just up and quit them because they have messed up, you help them through it (as long as it is truly worth it).

At the end of the day, true love doesn't exist in the absence of suffering, true love only exists in the presence of it. Love that has not been tried and tested is not true love at all.