When I was growing up, I always dreamed of falling in love. I thought it was this magical, powerful burst of emotions that forever bound you to the person you were meant to be with. I thought that once you were in love, it would never go away. Of course, that's somewhat typical of a naive 10-year-old.

Now I'm 20 and I know the truth. Love is a feeling, but it can fade. It can be mistaken for intense infatuation. It can be manipulated and twisted until it's unrecognizable. I know now that sometimes, love doesn't last forever. But I still believe in it. I still believe in that magical, heart stopping, butterflies-in-the-stomach love that I dreamed of as a little girl. Because over these past 10 years I've learned something else: Love is not just a feeling, it's a choice.

Now I know what you're thinking. "How can she believe in magical love while saying love is a choice?" My answer is quite simple. I believe that real love is a little of both. I believe that you fall in love, either slowly or all at once, then you choose to continue loving that person once the honeymoon phase is over and their flaws begin to show.

Too often in our culture, people cut and run at the first sign of trouble. Sure they'll stay through some fights, but the moment things get really hard, they find a way to get out. This could be ignoring the person, cheating or straight-up ending it. Love is choosing to stay and work through your problems even if you can't stand the person at that given moment.

You may fall in love with someone you don't expect to. I did. I fell in love with this guy and I didn't know how it was going to work, but we worked through it and are still happily together. That's not to say that we don't have problems,but we choose to continue loving and supporting one other even in our differences and arguments.

You see, feelings are not reliable. We are human beings with emotions that tend to run amok and change at the slightest thing. They fade and come back like the tides do. So why on Earth would you trust them with something like the person you love?

Love is a choice. It's a choice to love the person you're with despite their flaws. It's a choice to put in the work to make your relationship last. It's a choice to help them through their personal problems and celebrate their accomplishments. It's a choice to continue to love them even when all the heart stopping, butterflies-in-the-stomach feeling fades. Because it will fade. And that's normal. But when it does, you need to make a decision: to leave in search of the feeling again, or to stay and love the person until the feeling resurfaces.