Our generation has been constantly brainwashed into believing that true love is a feeling that brings constant, overwhelming joy into one's life every single day and will never, ever, fade. The truth is, no relationship can be founded on something as unstable as a "feeling." Falling in love is not that difficult to do, the feelings of excitement that come with something new are undeniable. But staying in love after that excitement of first learning everything about someone fades, that is real love. And that my friends, is a choice.
You make hundreds of choices everyday. You make the choice to get up for class (even though you really do not want to) in the morning. You make the choice to either eat healthy or not. You make the choice on how to spend your free time. Similar to all of those choices, you make the choice to love.
Making the choice to continue to love looks like trying to understand your partner. Making the choice to love is to hug them on days they are annoying the absolute crap out of you. Making the choice to love is being there to comfort them on days where they simply are being overdramatic. Making the choice to love is loving them the same on the good days and the bad.
It is so simple to give up on a rough day. The automatic excuse anymore for when a relationship has a rough day is, "Well, I don't know if I love them anymore."
Let me ask you this: did you make the decision to love them that day?
I once heard an incredibly wise minister say, "If the grass looks greener on the other side, maybe it is time to start watering your own yard."
Please, before you decide you do not love someone anymore. Before you decide it is not worth it. Before you decide that someone else may be better suited for you, make the decision to love. Just try it. If you know you have tried everything in your power, you will have no regrets down the road. But do not (SERIOUSLY DO NOT) base your relationship on something as unstable as feelings.
Picture this. If you have your dream career, does that mean you are never, ever going to have a bad day? Will there still be days when get off from a rough shift and think to yourself, "Maybe this wasn't the job for me." Do you quit right then? Wave your white flag because you're simply discouraged? Can you imagine how many jobs you would go through? Why is a relationship any different?
There are going to be bad days. There will be days when your partner looks at you and you will not have the butterflies. You will become annoyed some days. There will be days you question everything. There will also, however, be beautiful days. Days that make everything worth it. Days where you look at your partner and feel the same butterflies you did in the beginning, only, those will be more intense as you will truly know them because you have seen the worst and the best. Of course, there will be relationships that are simply not meant to be. Relationships where it seems there is only one good day for every month of bad days. At the point, it is time to reevaluate.
But until then, just give it a try. Choose love.
