I am 19 & graduated, but not in college right now. I am going to be 20 in three months, and I still live with my parents, while all of my friends are either living on campus at some school, or have their own apartment. My peers are out partying, exploring, and becoming independent. I am reading books, taking bubble baths in the comfort of my home, and never driving on the interstate because it’s too scary. My friends are focusing on midterms and football games. I am focused on my mental health, and making it through the rest of the day. I am not at all where I had planned to be at this time of my life. I would say I’m behind that, or paused from being ahead. I don’t know what I want to major in, or do for a living. I don’t know what my next chapter of life is going to hold. Searching for the “next step” is so tiresome and frustrating, and seems to take way longer than it should sometimes. It leaves us feeling weak, inadequate, and not good enough. Thankfully, I’ve found encouragement in the waiting, and I’d really like to share that with you.

I am in a place of transition in life right now. I would actually define myself as “lost in the transition". I'm sitting in an empty meadow that is my life, waiting to hear where I am called to go next. It feels like all of my friends are away at college, with all these big plans and amazing aspirations for their lives. I couldn’t be more happy and proud of them, but I would be lying if I claimed that I didn’t feel a pang of jealousy. High school used to be my safety net. In my high school years, I had the right to say that I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, and the freedom to just focus on the present. My biggest worry for my future was what my prom dress would look like, or what to buy my best friend for a graduation present. That was all fine and dandy through the months of August-June. But after I walked across that stage and smiled to get my picture taken with my diploma, I realized how many questions I was being faced with. Where do I want to go to school? WHEN do I want to go to school? What is my purpose here on Earth? What career do I want to pursue? What does God have planned for me as far as eventually moving out? Will I ever get past this anxiety disorder that seems dictate my life? Will I ever feel normal again? What’s going to happen to me if I feel this hopeless and sad forever, and it all gets to be too much to even get out of bed? How much time do I even have to answer these questions? There were (and are still) many uncertainties, and that can feel so stressful and heavy for me at times.

In this (rather long) period of transition, I’ve decided to turn to God for answers. He’s the one who took the time to paint the picture that is my life, and He’s the one who knows every single thing about me. I can’t think of anyone better to come to for advice in a time such as this.

I did some reading recently and was so overwhelmingly calmed by what God had to say about it all. It turns out that this time of being lost in the transition is the best thing that could be happening to me right now. (I know you’re thinking this is cheesy and you may be skeptical, but hear me out). I am exactly where I'm supposed to be, no matter how stuck or confused I may feel some days. I'm very confident in faith, that He is taking this time to build my character and grow my relationship with him, to fully equip me for the next chapter. I'm done fearing and stressing. I know that my God works in ways that are too captivating for me to ever understand, I know that things far better than I can comprehend are coming, and I know that I'm here to do big things for His kingdom up there. I also know that he’s vast enough to be doing the same thing for every other soul who feels stuck in transition. You could be fresh out of high school like myself, 25 and wondering if you’ll ever find your soulmate, or 60 and wondering how to spend your retirement years, or anywhere in between. You could be at any stage of life, and still be being built and growing into the best version of yourself for the next place you find yourself in. This fills me with so much contentment and peace. His timing is perfect, and knowing that makes me realize that there’s nowhere else for me to force myself to be. Waiting will never be an easy thing for any human (especially me, believe me), but it helps to have validation that you are growing as a person. Your time is coming, but you may be surprised to find that the journey is more important than your destination may end up being.