Moving to Orlando, Florida scared me tremendously. I was most scared because I had a gut feeling that at the end of my internship I’d come back to nothing. Before leaving for my College Program, I had a wonderful boyfriend and four people I considered to be my best friends. I was confident my boyfriend and I would make it and that my best friends would never leave. My boyfriend and I had survived a couple months being apart and only using snail mail. I spent all my time with my four friends and could not imagine anything changing. Of course, my gut feeling was sadly right.

My boyfriend at the time was jumping into basic training for the Army two months before I was to leave for Disney World. He was skeptical of my experience but supported me so I supported him. At the same time I had four best friends that I spent almost all my time with. We’d go out on the weekends, eat dinner together, do homework together, and just chill in each other’s living rooms. We had inside jokes, burnt biscuits, and lots of laughs. Before leaving I made them all promise to remain friends when I come back home, to which they all agreed.

My program was amazing in the beginning. I wrote my boyfriend every day and talked to my friends in our little group chat whenever I could. We’d talk on the phone and discuss them coming to see me. Eventually the person I was closer to in the group came down and we had so many Disney adventures. He and I had the best relationship and I loved him for that. All of sudden, it was a domino effect. In April, a week before coming home to see him, my boyfriend broke up with me because I was not the same person. I blamed Disney World for this for a while. I was so mad at myself for changing into someone different that the person I loved did not want me anymore.

I ended up still coming home in April and I saw all my friends. I could tell that there were some awkward tensions between the group. They seem to try and make me happy and make me coming home fun. It was a blast, felt like old times, but I came back home. A few days later I end up getting a call from one of the people in the group. Something went down and they were no longer friends. Essentially the group broke and I was devastated. I still talked to everyone in the group. Slowly but surely the group and I talked less other than two of them. However, my program came to an end and I ended up moving with two of the group members since I was going back to school. That was an even worse idea.

I ended up getting into an argument with one of the guys and I moved out. The other guy and I do not talk. The girl and I have not spoken in almost a year and I do not know why. Lastly, the person I thought would be there for me the most actually was not. Him and I had a great time almost a year ago and we never really spoke again. I have tried texting him but I guess our friendship really did not mean anything. My heart broke and I continued to blame the Disney College Program for that.

Losing my best friends and my boyfriend made me realize that I was changing. I became happier and more independent. I got a voice and learned how to speak up. So maybe I did change, and maybe that is okay. I honestly may have lost a guy and some friends but my opinion about them will never change. I really wish my old friends well and that they find peace with the rest of the group. I hope my ex-boyfriend continues to love his decision about being in the Army and works hard for it. I may have lost a lot, but I gained more than what I lost and I have the Disney College Program to thank for that.