Life comes with many highs and lows we know that. However, when the time comes, as it always does, and you lose someone you love it is a bit harder to comprehend. Losing the leader and the head of the family - our grandparents - makes it seem as if the world has stopped.

Losing a grandparent is difficult. Losing two a few months apart is harder. I lost my maternal grandfather in late September of 2018 and almost exactly one month later my paternal grandfather in late October 2018. Losing both in such a short time period was an excruciating month of pain and sorrow, especially being hours away at school. Having to witness my mother's sorrow along with my father's pain in such a brief amount of time made me realize how short life really is. I was thinking what could I do to ease the pain for my mother and my father at the same time. In addition to all the aunts, uncles, cousins, and close friends in mourning.

Whether it is expected or unexpected it's not an easy thing to cope with. Dealing with death doesn't get easier. My father has had many friends pass before their time and I asked him how he was okay and his response was that he had dealt with death a lot. It's not really anything new to him. And from that, I wondered if that is actually true.

I also wasn't sure why I asked how he was okay because people handle death and grief differently. Death is inevitable but it is never easy. I know I, personally, am not good with death. I didn't know if I could cry in front of others if it was weird that I wasn't crying, or even that I didn't really want to tell anyone. Losing someone is somewhat personal, so I think the way you handle these situations is up to you. There is no right way. I think we all want to be strong around others especially when you know other people might be hurting more. I tried my hardest not to cry at the funeral because I didn't want others to see me cry and I wanted to be strong for my family. But from what I've learned it's okay to cry and it's even okay not to cry.

After both my grandfathers passed away I wanted to do something to help my family relive the good times and cry happy tears. I made videos for both of them with a lot of pictures from when my grandpas were young all the way until they were older. These types of things help deal with death, so I would say that if you lose a grandparent just know they lived a full life with lots of love. But, if you want to cry every once in a while, do it.

Make as many memories as you can with your loved ones while they are here because that will be what you cherish when they're gone.