Losing "The One" you thought was your forever

I'm no stranger to heartbreak. When I was in high school, I never really had a boyfriend. I was always the friend, but never the girlfriend. When I went to college, that started to change, but I still didn't have much success in the dating world.

The summer of 2016, which was the summer during the year I had dubbed as "My Year of Single-hood", I was looking for anything but a serious relationship. But, as they say, God laughs when you tell him your plans. I met a man over that summer and he changed not only my life but also my year of being single.

The way we met was just like in the movies, and we fell for each other as fast as people do in them too. I had never been treated so well, loved so unconditionally, and met someone who I considered my equal. Compared to my few but past relationships, this was the best man I had ever met and had the pleasure of dating so it was not hard or honestly crazy to anyone when I would say "This is it. He's the one." But unlike the movies, our story came to an end.

We had issues in our relationship, but we always overcame them. I felt that our long-distance was the root of these problems and that we'd be able to overcome them once we shared the same area code. But as time went on and that possibility of being in the same place got further and further away, it became evident to me that there was more to be fixed. Despite our efforts, he felt it was best I move on without him.

The days that have followed have been really difficult. It's hard not to reach out to see how he is doing. I definitely have checked his Facebook a time or two. For a week or so, I didn't do anything with the pictures that flood my room or were my phone background. But now as the days pass, I have started to accept that what I have now are memories. The most difficult thing has been changing my state of mind and the plans that we had made for our future and instead, making plans for *my* future.

Ending a relationship period is hard. But ending a relationship you thought was your end is even harder. You lose someone who was such a big part of your life for whatever amount of time you had them. You lose their family and friends. And in some ways, you lose a little part of yourself. I'm thankful to have amazing friends and family who have supported me and loved me through this change. Coming to terms with losing the person I was so sure I'd spend the rest of my life with is not easy, and that can't be done alone.

I debated for awhile on whether or not to write this article. I didn't write this to get pity, or honestly to bash my ex. I didn't write this to air out the details of the end of our relationship. So that being said, I will say that I will always have a super special love for him. But I came to the conclusion to write this because I feel that someone out there has experienced this and if it can help them, then I feel my job is done. Losing "the one" has been a process, but I know that things will get better as the days go on. And they will for you too. I realize now that love is infinite, and it is possible to find that "one" again. But in the meantime, surround yourself with good friends and do things for yourself. Crank up that power playlist, go for a bike ride, and watch a lot of RomComs. Appreciate the good times you had and know you will always have those memories. For me, even though it ended entirely differently than I had always hoped, I would do it all over and over again. If you have ever lost "the one", make sure you don't lose yourself.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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