You hide in your room at the very back of your house. You wonder what she is doing as each day passes by. You sit and stare into the mirror. Tears run down your face. Consistently cursing at yourself for ever thinking her name.
But you remind yourself, she cannot hurt me anymore with empty promises.
With no text received or single call made, you begin to lose yourself to the person you said you would never become.
You begin to think maybe I am the problem.
You are, but you would rather hold onto your pride.
Why would it be your fault? She was the one who left you.
She has moved on from you and no longer needs you. Your name has faded from her lips. And the courage she had once received from you, she found for herself. She slipped through your fingertips with no intention of returning home to you.
There are still random pieces of hair that you find tangled in between your toes as your crawl underneath your sheets. You clean your room and find sweet note reading, “I love you - your baby.” Her green eyes and big smile have been burned into your brain. It is all you see when you catch those old hairs between your toes.
She is happy. This is what she wants.
You want to stop holding on yet for some reason, you do. Why?
My love, you must stop yearning for someone who will never return.
Your heart still beats and your lungs still fill with air.
You are fine, I promise.