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It's OK To Be In A Long-Term Relationship In College

Being tied-down and stuck with one person really must suck.

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Ah, long-term relationships. The good, the bad, the ugly. I think I can give you all a little taste of what it's like to be in a long-term relationship with someone during college. Below i'm going to explain more than a few of my thoughts on long-term relationships in college.

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It's OKAY that you don't understand.
Not everyone is fortunate enough to find the one early in life, and that's okay. Some people don't understand that when two people are in love they'll make it work regardless of what comes into play, and that's okay. What's not okay is putting others down or belittling their choice to be in a long-term relationship as a young adult. Everyone is different, and not everyone will will the same way as you. It's okay for others to not understand, frankly I don't expect them to. Love is love, age is age, gender is gender, and orientation is orientation.

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It's OKAY.
It's totally okay to be in a serious and committed relationship while in college. Often you'll hear that serious relationships at this time in your life are not a good idea. From parents and grandparents you'll often hear, "School is your first and number one priority, boys can wait." From friends and men your age you'll most likely hear, "Why would you want to spend the best years of your life with just one person, when there are so many more out there?" or "Why on Earth would you want to be tied down when you should be having fun?"

Most of the time, you'll hear something along those lines. But lets back up to the first issue... yes school is important and is a very high priority, but that doesn't mean that you can't hold a strong relationship. I mean think about it, you hold friendships and family relationships throughout college; why can't you hold a relationship? Yes, relationships take time and effort- on both parts- but it definitely is something you are capable of doing.

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You've found the one.
Imagine this, you are a freshman in college and you meet a boy that you fall madly in love with... a year or two goes by and begin to realize that he's the one. You both have those same feelings toward each other and can't wait to begin the rest of your life together. If you and your significant other feel the same way and are both committed in your relationship, then there isn't really any reason to worry about the "many other guys out there." Once you've found the one, you know it and in my opinion it would be just awful to take advice from a family member or friend that claims that you shouldn't be tied to one person.

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Skewed mentality of the college-aged.
There are reasons that men ages 18-25 often have the mentality of being in a long-term relationship as being metaphorically "tied-down," or "stupid." Well for one, they don't mature as fast or at the same rate as most girls. It's obvious how that may have something to do with it. For two, most- not all- men these ages have it in their head that college is the time to get with with as many girls as they can, or want. If that's what you're in to or what you want to do, go for it. But for a good handful of us girls at this age- we want relationships: real, committed relationships.

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You're not "tied down."
Now on to being "tied down when you should be having fun."
Like I previously mentioned, being in a long-term relationship of almost five years, I have had some of the most best and exciting times of my life. If you are in a relationship and struggle to have fun or be yourself, you may have some communicating to do. Or maybe you're with the wrong person. When in a relationship I feel that it's important for both people to have fun and be themselves. You don't have to be together to have fun, and you don't have to be away from each other to have fun. Being in a relationship for a long period of time does not constitute your ability to have fun.

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Be grateful.
All in all I feel that you should be grateful to have found your soul-mate and the one you want to spend the rest of your life with so early. This gives you time to grow with each other. Your partner will have been through both the difficult times and the high times with you. Often you'll come to a bump in the rough road of college and young adult years, but instead of facing it alone- you'll face it alongside the special someone that you have grown with over the years. You'll face it with your best-friend and the person that has quickly became one of the most important parts of your life.

I am grateful to have found my love this young and I wouldn't have it any other way. We have grown up together and because of that, we share a special kind of bond and energy that I never knew was possible until I met him.

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An ambitious, sometimes organized, blonde with a great sense of humor.University of Michigan - Flint | 2017Psychology and Substance Abuse & Treatment

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