I'm Moving Away From My Boyfriend But That Doesn't Mean We're Breaking Up

I'm Moving Away From My Boyfriend But That Doesn't Mean We're Breaking Up

Long distance or down the street, we're staying together.

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Back in September, I applied and got accepted into the Disney College Program. This means I'll be away from my home state for four months, maybe six and a half if I apply and get accepted to extend my program. Being gone, I'm not only leaving my friends and family, but I'm leaving my boyfriend too.

A ton of people have asked me if we're going to break up and to set the record straight, the answer is NO.

Why would we even think about breaking up? It's only four months, and that's nothing. I blinked and we were already dating for four months. It's going to go by super quick.

On top of that, he supports me going and was beyond happy for me that I was accepted on the first try—not to brag or anything)! He wants me to go, not because he wants time apart, but because he knows that it's an amazing opportunity for me. He reminds me every time the Disney College Program comes up.

We both know that we're still going to talk to each other every day, or almost every day depending on my schedule. But we're both adults and can send a quick message to each other so that we know we aren't ignoring or forgetting about one another.

I think that a lot of long distance relationships don't work because of all this fake stuff people watch in movies and on TV—like no one is going to miss the most important business meeting of their life to have brunch with you...

One thing that I've noticed about people moving away and being in a relationship, is that they don't communicate. They don't communicate their worries and fears BEFORE they move, they don't do it during the move and if they are coming back soon they don't do it AFTER unless it's in a fight.

The thing about my boyfriend and I is that we've talked about what's going to happen when I have a crazy crazy schedule and it doesn't line up with his already busy schedule. We've talked about what's gonna happened when I leave and when I come back. We've talked about thing plenty of times and I think that we've for the most figured it out.

The other thing that I noticed with people going into long distance relationships is that they expect way too much and too many unrealistic things, and I think a lot of this comes from what is shown to us through social media.

I don't expect my boyfriend to jump on a plane every other weekend to come see me, and he doesn't expect that I do the same. We don't expect to have regular conversations like we do now, we both know that we might get a short window of opportunity to talk to each other depending on our schedules. We both know that it's going to be hours and hours before one of us replies to a text message. I don't expect him to send me a million and one packages. I don't expect him to drop everything to have a 10-minute phone call with me, and vice versa.

There are too many expectations and not enough communication, and I think that this is a huge problem when entering a long distance relationship. It's probably the reason so many people have asked me if we're breaking up or not. Yeah, it's going to be tough being away from each other, but we wouldn't be doing it if it wasn't worth it.

Oh and for the record for everyone who's asked me about us breaking up, even if something were to happen, guess what? We've already talked about it.

This is an opportunity not only for me but for him too and us together. So, yes, we're staying together but it's not like that was anyone's business anyway.

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Why Getting Away From Where You Grew Up Is Important

College is the perfect time to get away from home and go out into the real world.
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As you get older, life sometimes makes it hard for you to take control and go to the places you've only dreamed of. There's always a work meeting, ballet recital, or something to hold you back from taking that trip planned four summers ago. College is the perfect time to get away from home and go out into the real world.

It's important to get away from everything you know at one point in your life. There is a whole world full of risk, chance, and experience. The security you have in your hometown can be traded in for adventure and change. There's a time to try something new, learn something that blows your mind, or go somewhere that takes your breath away. That time is now, to feel like you are actually doing something worthwhile with your life.

It is important to get away from where you have grown up for some of your life. You need to grow on your own, without anyone there to tell you you're wrong or out of line being a certain way. The transition from high school to college is the gift of independence. You choose who you get to be without anyone holding your past against you. It's a do-over, a second chance after the mistakes and regrets you lived through in high school. Yet, being away from home has its drawbacks as you lose familiar faces, a steady schedule, and many creature comforts. But, all of these can be found in a new place with time. Leaving the place you grew up gives you another chance to grow again, without boundaries. Travel whenever you get an opportunity because it may not come again. Test your limits while living your actual dreams. Go out and explore the world—you're only here once and don't have time to take it for granted. Leaving everything you know sounds scary, but there are great memories to be made out there.

Whether this new place for you is two hours from home, or 20, it's different, it's exciting and it's change. It is important to get away from where you grew up and learn from the adventures you embark on. It is the best way to find yourself and who you want to be. It's what you'll remember when you look back on everything you've done.

Cover Image Credit: Madison Burns

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Ghosting Is The Coward's Way Out In A New Age Of Relationships

What is so difficult about telling someone you're not interested?

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A while back, I was strolling through Target with my mom in the book section when she asked me what "ghosting" was. I explained to her that it was a common term for when two people were talking or dating when suddenly, one of the people fell off the radar with no explanation.

They became like a ghost––hence the term. Sometimes, it was even mutual ghosting.

The term has become so common, in fact, that my mom found herself staring at a book entitled "Ghosted," a story centered on a young woman who falls in love over the course of a week and unexpectedly finds herself ghosted.

I've read countless articles on this topic. Some are in favor of this decision, saying it's completely acceptable and even encouraged in some situations. Others find it gross, disrespectful and cowardly.

I have to say, I must agree with the latter.

With the exception of abusive circumstances, there really is no excuse not to pick up the phone and be honest with the person you've been talking to.

If someone has been investing time into you, getting to know you, then you owe it to them and yourself to end things properly. If you have gone on a few dates with this person, then expectations are now in place that should be respected. Communication is one of the major foundations of respect in any relationship––be it a romantic or a platonic relationship.

It's common sense and basic decency. When did those fly out the window?

If you aren't interested anymore, there's nothing wrong with that! The offense comes when you choose the coward's way out instead of choosing a more honorable route. Maybe the other person won't like what you have to say, but at least you can say you did the right thing.

Ghosting is a sign of emotional immaturity.

It's a selfish act that only succeeds in making the recipient feel bad about themselves, wondering what they did wrong...what they could have done differently. Not only is it hurtful, but it could lead to trust issues with future dating attempts, derailing their own love life.

You see, your decision has a domino effect in ways you probably don't care to see.

What is so difficult about telling someone you're not interested? Why not give yourself and your partner the closure that will help each of you move forward?

In all honesty, someone who ghosts you isn't really someone you want to be in a relationship, to begin with.

Think of it this way: They showed their true colors and you effectively dodged a bullet. Maybe it's the new dating trend, but it's not ethical or healthy by any means, and their poor decision may have saved you some major future heartache.

For now, just keep kissing those frogs. One of them is bound to turn into your prince/princess.

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