This past weekend was Valentine's Day. For some, it was a day to shower your loved ones with gifts and an excuse to go on a nicer date than usual. For others, it is a day that you spend alone or with other single friends watching romantic comedy movies and eating the chocolate that you purchased yourself and deserve. But some of us, who are happily in a relationship, won't get to spend the holiday with their special someone.
Long-distance relationships are not easy. I know many people, including myself, testify to that. Miles between you and the person you love is hard at times because they are the only one you want to talk to or go see that new movie with. You think about them constantly, maybe even start overthinking and placing scenarios in your head. Arguments are tough because they are over the phone, and, let's be honest, when you are back together again, arguing is the last thing you want to do. All you want is to see their smile, hear their laugh and feel their hugs.
Long distance taught me to trust. I'm not saying I don't trust my boyfriend (because I definitely do), but once you're far away, you don't know what's going on every second of their day. It's hard to truly understand their daily life. You don't get to meet their new friends or see their campus until you make a road trip. It's hard to picture their life without you by their side every day, but it's the same feeling for them as well. There will be many "my university versus your university" debates, but both of you are always thinking the same thing: "If only we were on the same campus."
Long distance taught me what love is. Love is calling a place home when you're with a person not in a specific city. Love is staying with someone when their apartment is a mess. Love is giving someone support in whatever they do on their campus. Love is being understanding when plans get rearranged. Love is going to that awkward party where you don't know anyone but because your favorite person wants to go. Love is all the simple things that you can only get when you give your relationship 110 percent, whether you are afraid or not.
Love made me grow as a person. I can no longer rely on my theory of a high school relationship. It is even possible within a day that you might only have time to say "Hey, how are you?" to your partner, but the good thing about this is it makes you stronger. It lets you know that they love you without them having to say it. For a while, this is scary. I'm the kind of person who wants constant reassurance out of fear of losing loved ones, and I probably owe that to past relationships. Even though it might not be said as often as when you are young and in love, you know that all the feelings are still there. You start to think and act as an adult. You start to plan more for vacations and less for the every weekend dates.
This is dedicated to my boyfriend who is just over 70 miles away, which can feel like forever. I miss you and I love you. More importantly, I thank you for taking this journey with me, for not giving up when things are frustrating, for knowing that when I worry myself sick that it is out of love, and for calling me between classes even if we only have minutes to talk. I didn't always picture myself in a long distance relationship, but I wouldn't want to be with anyone else, so we do what we have to. I feel for those who are in an even more distant relationship because I know it is harder.
To all of those who are overthinking Valentine's Day and what they should give their significant other, give them your time and your attention. At the end of the day, the flowers are going to die and the chocolate will be eaten, but the most important thing is the memory that you made.
