One of the things I dreaded most coming to college was how it would affect my relationship with my long-term boyfriend. We didn’t want to break up, but we knew the distance would put limitations on our relationship. We went to the same high school and we live five minutes away from each other. We would see each other almost every day. I was afraid the distance would make us drift apart. It terrified me.
We chose schools without considering how close we would be to each other. We didn’t want to impact each other's educational choices. We ended up picking schools an hour away from each other, which isn’t that bad considering how far away we could have been. The distance wouldn’t have been a problem but neither of us had cars, so it was.
The first week was the hardest for me. I missed my best friend terribly, but I didn’t have much control over the situation and neither did he. Communicating with each other became even more prevalent. We had to rely on texting more than ever. We were never a couple that texted throughout the day, because we would always see each other by the end of the day. We made Skype dates and even sent a few letters. The most important part of staying in touch is staying positive. You can’t let yourself get all worked up when you’re too busy one day or when technology craps out. It happens.
So far we have managed to see each other twice a month with the help of buses and great friends, but when you’re in a long distance relationship, the time you spend together never seems like enough. At times, not being able to see each other can be painful. The time you do spend together becomes a lot more special though. You learn to appreciate your time together a lot more. There is sometimes this pressure that you have to have something planned, like a date night, but usually just being with each other is enough. You learn to love the simple things about being together.
Eight months ago, I was beyond nervous that distance would ruin my relationship. Looking back over the school year I realized the distance only made us get closer and strengthened our relationship. Long distance relationships can be a shit show, but not always. I hear of long distance couples where there is cheating and lying, but that does not have to be a relationship's fate. Both people have to be willing to put the effort in to make it work because it isn’t always easy, but it is worth it.
