"The Lizzie McGuire Movie" was my absolute favorite movie as a kid, and I know I'm not alone. The entire soundtrack was my anthem for at least a year. My greatest dream was to be swept away to a romantic city and show all my friends (and the world) that deep down, I was a secret pop star with a new pop star BFF. (On some level, that's still my dream.)
Here's why I used to cry after watching this 2003 masterpiece.
1. Eighth grade graduation
So Lizzie and her class get to go to Rome for their eighth grade class trip? I was exceedingly underwhelmed when my eighth grade class trip was to Chicago to see an aquarium and a science museum. Now, I understand the unrealistic nature of the world of film, but as a kid, I was devastated not to have my chance at a fairy tale grad trip.
2. Roman Vacation
When I was a sophomore in high school, my family and I went on a European vacation. We stopped for a while in Rome, and I was looking everywhere for a Paolo. Where was my international adventure?! I stood on the Spanish Steps and all I could think was "Oh my god, Lizzie McGuire was here." My wish at the Trevi Fountain was "Please let my life be as fabulous as Lizzie McGuire's."
3. Playing Hooky
When Lizzie plays sick so she can go meet up with Paolo and miss touring the city with her class, I thought that was perfectly normal. I thought, as a teenager, I would need to learn how to trick my teachers so I could sneak away to meet romantic boys for exciting dates, and was thoroughly disappointed when that need never arose. You can't always just run off and find an adventure, Lizzie! It isn't that easy!
4. Love
Even though Paolo turned out to be a dirtbag in the end, you have to admit that the way he wooed Lizzie was pretty enviable. Mopeds through the city, singing on an empty stage, and the added secrecy of it all made Lizzie's romantic escapades the pinnacle of perfection for seven/eight-year-old me. Then, when Paolo turns out to be a jackass, he gets everything that's coming to him (how often does that happen in real life) and Lizzie's BFF-turned-romantic interest, Gordo, is there to pick up all the pieces. It was so perfect, so unrealistic, and so my goal for the last decade.
5. Being a pop star
If Lizzie McGuire, with no acting or singing on her resume, can be randomly picked up and turned into an accidental pop star overnight, then WHY CAN'T I? There is no experience that could ever possibly compare to the vicarious joy I get from watching Lizzie perform at the music awards at the end of the movie. All her friends and family are there to watch her, and Lizzie nails the show like she's been a megastar her whole life. The fact that "What Dreams Are Made Of" is the actual most fantastical and amazing song in the universe also helps to make that scene A+.
To sum up, "The Lizzie McGuire Movie" is the absolute best movie you will ever watch, but it WILL make you hate your life, because you know it can never be as awesome as hers. I suggest that you watch it and have a little cry. Just a little one.
