If You're Living Your Life Without A Vocal Filter, You Might Be Getting Yourself Into Trouble

If You're Living Your Life Without A Vocal Filter, You Might Be Getting Yourself Into Trouble

Just think to yourself will this comment add to the conversation or disrupt it.
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Do you ever have those moments where something pops into your head and you know you shouldn’t say it, but you do anyway?

How about when you want to say something specific, but the words you use to get your point across give off a different meaning? Or even when you are trying to joke with someone, but it comes out insulting? This would be what it is like to live life without a vocal filter. I feel like there are plenty of people that can relate to this issue.

I write this from personal experience because unfortunately, I am plagued with this curse myself. Most people would think I am a shy and timid person, which I guess to a certain extent is true, but those I am closest to would beg to differ. When I am comfortable around the people I am with, I am a talker and once I start it’s hard to get me to stop. This herein lies my problem.

You know how people say think before you speak? Well, that’s pretty good advice and you should take it. I never think before I speak and that’s how I end up in some awkward or tense situations. When a thought comes to mind, I have to say it, it’s like a compulsion. Most of the time I regret what I said the minute I said it, but other times I’m completely left in the dark as to what I said that was so wrong.

Like I said, living with this curse can leave you in some awkward or tense situations. I find myself more in the awkward situations than the tense ones, but I have been in both.

For instance, I have a lot of people in my family and close circle that have a dirty mind and sometimes, they take what I say sexually instead of the innocent comment it was meant to be. This is obviously a more awkward/comical situation as most people end up laughing and I just shake my head. I usually know what to say and what not to say in front of these people, but because of the lack of a vocal filter, it comes out anyway and I’m just left there shaking my head.

Now, let’s talk about some of the more tense situations. Have you ever called someone a name that was humorous, and you were just kidding with them, but they took it more to heart than as a joke? Well, I have found myself in this situation a few times and let me tell you, it is not fun to receive that ‘how could you’ face from someone you care about.

For example, an old coworker of mine, whom I was very close with, and I used to mess with each other all the time at work. It helped kill time and the customers always got a kick out of our playfulness. One day he was interacting with a kid and you could tell this kid was uncomfortable with talking to strangers as he gave my coworker the ‘I don’t know you, why are you talking to me?’ look and I had to laugh.

After the customers left, I made the comment that the kid looked at him like he was the creepy guy in the neighborhood. Now, I meant no harm with this statement, it was a joke, but my coworker took offense. However, being the kind-hearted person he was, he just told me it hurt him instead of like yelling at me or something. I never meant to hurt his feelings and of course, I apologized, but the whole situation could have been avoided if I had just kept my mouth shut and actually thought about what I was saying.

Hopefully, most of you only have moments where you don’t have a filter and don’t have to live with this curse, but I’m sure some of you have it like me where it happens all too often. For people like us, we must be extra careful with what we say and must remind ourselves to think about what we are about to say. Sometimes a misunderstanding can be the difference between a hardy laugh and the loss of a friendship.

So, if there is any advice I could offer you out of this, is to be mindful of others before you speak. Think about your audience because I cannot tell you how many times I have embarrassed myself at work by talking when customers are around.

I know this is hard to do, believe me, I still struggle to keep my mouth shut. Just think to yourself will this comment add to the conversation or disrupt it.

Sometimes things are just better left unsaid.

Cover Image Credit: Instagram

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The 17 Best Unpopular Opinions From The Minds Of Millennials

Yes, dogs should be allowed in more places and kids in less.
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There are those opinions that are almost fact because everyone agrees with them. Waking up early is horrible. Music is life. Sleep is wonderful. These are all facts of life.

But then there are those opinions that hardly anyone agrees with. These ones -- from Twitter, Pinterest and Reddit -- are those types of opinions that are better left unsaid. Some of these are funny. Some are thought-provoking. All of them are the 17 best unpopular opinions around.

1. My favorite pizza is Hawaiian pizza.

2. Binge watching television is not fun and actually difficult to do.

3. I love puns... Dad jokes FTW.

4. Milk in the cup first... THEN the bloody tea.

5. I wish dogs were allowed more places and kids were allowed fewer places.

6. "Space Jam" was a sh*t movie.

7. Saying "money cannot buy happiness" is just wrong.

8. People keep saying light is the most important thing in photographing. I honestly think the camera is more important.

9. Bacon is extremely overrated.

10. Literally, anything is better than going to the gym.

11. Alternative pets are for weird people.

12. Google doodles are annoying.

13. It is okay to not have an opinion on something.

14. It's weird when grown adults are obsessed with Disney.

15. This is how to eat a Kit Kat bar.

16. Mind your own business.

17. There is such a thing as an ugly baby.

Cover Image Credit: Pixabay

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You Are Not Defined By Others, Only You Can Determine Who You Are

When asked who I was, I realized that I could not list all of the things that have shaped me throughout my life.

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In college classrooms, I frequently get asked about who I am, and what has shaped me into the person that I have become. I have often been questioning my personal identity and the aspects of my life that make me unique. While this intense reflection on who I am can seem frustrating and useless, it has given me a greater sense of myself and a deeper understanding of my place in society.

I was assigned the "Who Am I" poem, which is an assignment that allows students to reflect on their own identity, and the pieces that have helped shape them into the person that they are today. These poems are a great way to encourage self-reflection and either look at the broader aspects of your life or focus on a specific idea to discover your identity. Each statement begins with the powerful words "I am.." which allows you to define yourself in your own words and can allow others to recognize aspects of themselves that are similar to you.

I am sharing my "Who Am I" poem, in the hopes that you will reflect on your own identity and realize you unique you truly are.

Who Am I?

I am a military child, the daughter of an Active Duty soldier and an honorably discharged civilian.

I am the older sister with fiery red hair who is fiercely defensive of her younger brother and little cousins.

I am a member of a small family and am split between a Catholic, conservative side and a liberal, non-religious side. My family is my rock, and I am fiercely loyal to those I love.

I come from large Thanksgiving dinners around my grandmother's table, and putting dried apple slices into homemade butternut squash soup.

I love driving down winding roads and being surrounded by the colors of fall and nature.

I am a lifelong learner through years of cultural experience, media exposure, and the experiences of friends, family, and strangers I meet.

I am a woman who has traveled to over thirty countries across the globe.

I come from walking around in markets and bargaining to get the best price on what I want.

I am a bubble of energy and a force to be reckoned with who has trained with the police academy for self-defense.

I am a certified yoga teacher who strives to share her passion and energy of the mental and physical healing properties with others.

I am a dedicated listener, and try not to say everything that comes into my head.

I am half-Jewish, half-Catholic, and continuously questioning about my religious identity because I am unsure where I fit.

I am a mix of many European cultures but embraced my Irish heritage when I kissed the Blarney Stone in Ireland.

I am a strong advocate for what I believe in and stand up for those who cannot do it for themselves.

I am a writer, who strives to share her opinions and beliefs with others so that they can create their own.

I am a person who believes in the freedom to choose who you want to be, not be defined by stereotypes or social norms.

I am myself, and there is no one else I'd rather be.

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