Imagine this—waking up, every single day of your life with uncertainty…and not just normal life uncertainties…nahh, like how you will get through the day without messing up socially, physically, and emotionally. That’s me. And it’s been me for the past 20 years. When I was little, I never truly understood I was different. I knew that my arm and leg didn’t look normal and that I was going through surgeries every other year to “fix me,” but I kind of just overlooked it, I guess. It wasn’t until I was maybe 11 years old when the fact that it won’t ever change; being handicapped, that is. I’m a stroke survivor.

Every day I see people doing things I wish I could do, and when I actually try doing something that’s impossible for me, I either fail miserably or just look awkward. Just holding out my right hand or even clapping looks weird to me. It sucks, really sucks. Yeah, I have adaptions in place to do some things, but it seems like I find something new that I can’t do at all, and it absolutely kills me inside. You feel that you are useless. A failure, a nobody. And people don't understand that its not just a physical disability, it's mental too. Sometimes I am embarrassed to ask for help because I feel like it’s a burden. I never wanted to feel like something that happened to me that was out of my control was, in fact, my fault, but I still do at times. It impacts every single person in my life in some way. Whether it be positive or negative, the impact is there. My family has definitely seen the best and worst of the struggles. Words cannot explain the love I have for my family. They don’t deserve this. To have the stress of seeing a son, nephew, cousin, or grandson struggle. To see me get hurt. But no one has given up on me. They are my inspiration. My absolute everything.

Faith has one of the greatest impacts in my life as well. I am a devout Christian, and my faith in the Lord has kept me motivated to never ever give up. I believe that He has a plan for me that has incredible things in store for me; as he does for everyone else in the world. It is Him that I continue to trust push me in the direction I am supposed to be going.

I find ways every day to defy the odds, prove people wrong, and keep moving forward. Yes; the things I cannot do eat at me constantly, but there are a hell of a lot more things that I can do. Adaptions can be made, and with that, I’m smooth sailing. It’s hard to imagine a life that is different; a life where I have full feeling and sensation on the right side of my body. A life where I don’t feel like I’m being stared at because of my handicap. A life where, even now, as a sophomore in college, it's not hard as hell to relate to people at times and make true friendships; or even *gasp* find a girl that actually wants to date me. (#foreveralone) That's a life that I would call…normal.

A normal life sounds great. And I’m never going to have that. And that, too, is okay, because I’m making the absolute most with the life I have and the people that I am living my life with. I know now that I am on this earth; God specifically chose ME to be on this earth and to live with a disability for the purpose of being an inspiration!

Actor, Bradley Whitford has a quote that I absolutely love and live by: “Infuse your life with action. Don't wait for it to happen. Make it happen. Make your own future. Make your own hope. Make your own love. And whatever your beliefs, honor your creator, not by passively waiting for grace to come down from upon high, but by doing what you can to make grace happen... yourself, right now, right down here on Earth.” Never wait for something to happen, or sell yourself short because you don’t think you can do it. Go for it. The goals you set for yourself are absolutely attainable! I might have been dealt, well, a really crappy card in this game we call life, but I'm doing every single thing in my power to give it all I can every day and all day. I’m going to get knocked down; we all do. But staying down just prevents me from finding and capitalizing on a potentially amazing opportunity placed in front of me. The most recent one being pulling the trigger to transfer to IU.

I didn’t really realize it in high school, because I was too busy acting like an idiot and not using my brain whatsoever, but now in college, entering my junior (sophomore…transferring holds you back, I have learned.) year, I know that I can be a difference and make a difference in the lives of others through my disability. At Indiana University, I am on the Corporate Relations committee for Indiana University’s Dance Marathon, IUDM, which raises money and awareness for Riley Hospital for Children. It was actually that organization that led me to transfer to IU quicker than I was planning to. I’m so grateful it did too. From there, I am now giving my Riley story to at least four collegiate Dance Marathons this school year. Whether it be the Greek community at IU, dancers during the marathon, or parents of struggling Riley kids, I want to help. But that’s a different story for another day! I’m finally where I want to be in my life. I now know what God has called me on this Earth to do: Inspire.

I guess where I’m getting at is that there is no obstacle or challenge in my life that I cannot overcome. This disability cannot stop me. I may need some help along the way, but the mountain of hardship I climb every day has a summit. Every day I reach that summit. My disability does not define me. I will never let that happen, because I am so much more than that. I have such amazing friends that can pick me up when I am down, and they have been such big influences in my life and one of the reasons I'm determined to be a better me every single day of my life.

I want to end this with an amazing quote, because what’s an inspirational article without a badass quote to end it on?? It is this: “When something bad happens in your life, you have three choices…you can let it define you, you can let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.” Within the past year, I have finally figured out how I approach living life as stroke survivor. I think you can take a guess.