I was walking to my class today–late as always–when I realized that my phone wasn’t in my pocket. Darn it. The reason I was reaching for this prized possession was to check just how late I was, but at that moment, I had only the angle of the sun to gauge where I was in the time-space continuum. Great. Though, with the freedom of not being beckoned to stare into my phones loving gaze, I was able to consider just why I was upset about abandoning it that morning. Boredom. Without my phone, how will I counteract the impending doom of not having something to do?

You all know how it works; we’re in a waiting room, waiting for class to begin, caught in an awkward conversation, and we find refuge in our phones. We are losing the art of conversation, as well as making our own fun, by replacing it with the comforting repetition of scrolling, and then scrolling again. How many times are we viewing posts on Facebook that we have already seen since we checked it less than five minutes ago? I wonder how many conversations have been lost in my own life because I was too busy texting someone not present in that waiting room, or in my dorm. What if there was someone next to me, who was having a bad day, that needed nothing more than a friendly hello and the kind gesture of my asking how their day has been? No, that would make me too vulnerable, instead, I’m just going to creep through the pictures of someone who I haven’t talked to in years. How scary. And, how sad.

On that short walk to class, I began the slow process of mourning the loss of those interactions. The new friend I would have made before my English class, the Facebook friend of mine who was sitting next to me in the library, can we even hold a real conversation? What was her day like besides what she posted on social media? I don’t know, but I do know how many likes my last Instagram photo got. How trivial. How superficial. Two adjectives I never want to associate with myself. Do I seek to know my own friend’s stories, not just what their “story” is on Snapchat? Am I profiling people based on their profile picture? Through these subtle, harmless means, technology has driven a wedge between us and our fellow man. We have lost the ability to be friendly and warm in speech, and instead, we fill our text bubbles with emoticons since we have even forgotten how to express our emotions through words.

So, I challenge you as I challenge myself: put down your phone, talk to that girl sitting next to you on the subway. Don’t have a date with your phone sitting alone at lunch, sit with someone new. Ask them about their major or their job, and you’ll learn just a little bit about their hopes and dreams. Yes, that video about those cats was pretty funny, and it brought joy to your day, but at what cost? There will always be time to check your social media, but will you ever have the opportunity to reach out to that specific person again? Maybe not. Will you ever have the chance to live this moment of your REAL life again? No.

I’m not saying go cold turkey; social media does have an enormous ability to draw people together and transmit good information quickly but it is a luxury that is very easy to abuse. Instead of spending hours of the day unconsciously dedicating our lives to the altars of our phones, we should reach out to someone. Additionally, the noble goal of social media can be accomplished by using it to learn. You might even find some conversation starters by using technology to your advantage. Google Maya Angelou; watch documentaries on YouTube; follow Instagram users that post beautiful artwork. Do you know who fought in World War II or who our Secretary of State is? I hope so, but google it if you don’t, use technology as it should be used.

And please, sit with that person who is sitting alone at lunch, having a date with their personality-less, plastic device. Be a warm, personable human friend to him or her; you never know how it will change not only their life but yours.