Listening Is Not Something Our Generation Is Born Knowing How To Do
Relationships

Listening Is Not Something Our Generation Is Born Knowing How To Do

Even though I don’t always fully understand what they’re going through, I still care.

234
Unsplash

“Hey, Iara! Are you busy? I need someone to talk to.” This is not a specific message I’ve gotten before, but I get variations of text messages like this one on a regular basis. This doesn’t surprise me though, ever since I was a child I would always sit at the table and listen to my grandma talk about her life, frustrations, passions, and the “awful” men in her life.

My dad felt sorry for me because I spent most of my summers with her and I would listen to the same stories over and over again. What my dad didn’t know is that I loved listening to her and to anyone that was willing to share their deepest thoughts and feelings with me.

This remains true to this day –I love to listen to people talk and share with me things that perhaps other people are too busy to listen. Don’t get me wrong, at times I sacrifice some of my time to listen to others, but I can’t do it all the time…that would be nuts! The good thing is that these people don’t take me for granted and thank me for “truly listening” to them.

Now, what does truly listening mean? Don’t we all listen the same way? What do I do differently than other people? Is it that I make eye contact? Is it that I don’t interrupt and wait for them to be done talking? Is it that I try to put myself in their shoes? Is it that I ask questions that are not so much about what happened, but rather about how they felt? Is it that others talk too much instead of listen? I’m not exactly sure what makes me a good listener, but I do know that this is one of my best qualities.

I think I fall in love with how people talk about things that matter to them. I fall in love with how people’s eyes spark after realizing that I care about what they have to say. I fall in love with how much I learn by listening to other people’s experiences. I think this is what life is about. I can’t speak without listening first. And at times I just don’t speak at all. Is it even needed?

After listening to a friend talk and pour their hearts out, I don’t always know what to say, but I do know how to look at them and let them know that even though I don’t fully understand what they’re going through, I still care.

It’s not about being born a good listener though. I remember when I was a kid I would cover peoples’ mouths if I didn’t want to hear them talk. (I was an only child and my mom passed when I was very young, so I basically got a pass for everything) But I was conditioned into listening more. Life gave me different experiences and placed people in my life that taught me to listen more and talk less.

Like anything else in life, you are capable of learning how to listen more, even when all you want to do is talk.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Swoon

I Started Dating A Guy Before Quarantine, But Now We Rarely Speak Unless I Double-Text

"He's really nice and cute and I like being around him when we see each other, but he's awful at communication."

Each week Swoonie B will give her advice on anonymous topics submitted by readers. Want to Ask Swoonie B something related to dating and relationships? Fill out this form here — it's anonymous.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

This Is Exactly What You Should Eat Today In Quarantine, Based On Your Zodiac Sign

You've probably been eating it the past three months,

If we added up all the minutes of my life I've stood in front of the fridge or pantry mindlessly glazing over options, it would probably amount to several years longer than I'd care to admit.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

If You Don't Think People Are Legitimately Scared To Stay In Lockdown, Think Again

People are terrified of what could happen if states stay in lockdown too long.

Coronavirus (COVID-19) continues to be the topic of discussion for most U.S. residents. From federal reopening guidelines to individual state timelines, the country is all over the place. This sparks conversations within the news, social media, and in family homes about the consequences of reopening the country incorrectly.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

If You Don't Think People Are Legitimately Scared To Reopen States, You're Not Looking Hard Enough

People are terrified of what could happen if states begin reopening too early.

Coronavirus (COVID-19) continues to be the topic of discussion for most U.S. residents. From federal reopening guidelines to individual state timelines, the country is all over the place. This sparks conversations within the news, social media, and in family homes about the consequences of reopening the country incorrectly.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Feel A Lil' Better: Because You Need To Stretch It Out

Your weekly wellness boost from Odyssey.

No matter how good (or bad) you'd describe your health, one thing is for sure: a little boost is ALWAYS a good idea. Whether that's reading a new, motivating book, or listening to a song that speaks to your soul, there are plenty of resources to help your health thrive on any given day.

Flexibility is an important part of life. Yes, you need to be able to go with the flow and adjust when needed, but literal, physical flexibility is equally handy. Not only does increased flexibility keep you safe from injury each time you work out, but a good stretch session is incredibly soothing after a long day. Your body goes through a lot! It needs to cool down and get loose after all the activities you put it through.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

5 Amazing Things That Happened To Me When I Took Just A Week Off From Social Media

I've taken one-week off social media, and here's what I learned.


You’ll think clearer.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments