Imagine this: You're walking to class, minding your own business, maybe listening to some music when suddenly you encounter a terror more fear-inciting than a failing grade on an exam: you find yourself in a stand off with Lindenwood University's most horrifying residents, the Canadian geese. Sheer panic clutches your insides and when you stare into those menacing and piercing black eyes suddenly you're faced with the ultimate survival tactic of fight or flight. Some choose to pull their backpacks up high and march determinedly forward, screw those geese, right? Others choose the path less traveled, down the side of the lawn. The rest just turn around and sprint the other way, because ain't nobody got time for a goose attack.
Popular entertainment website, Break, posted a video entitled, "Gandalf the Goose," which shows multiple Lindenwood students going up against the harshest rival they'll probably ever encounter in their lives. After being up for only 18 hours, the video has received 157k plus views, 3.3k plus likes, and over 1,400 shares. Other popular sites such as Smosh decided to join in and laugh at the terrified students expense by posting a video called "Jerks with Wings," (right on, Smosh, right on.) Naturally, commenters put in their two cents about the situation and gave me a few laughs:
Well sir, astute observation and a lot of people *wish* we could get rid of the geese but according to the e-mail blast we receive weekly:
And commenters like Dauna have clearly never looked into the eyes of death before:
Yeah,
Dauna, let me see you chase down this vicious predator when you're just a tired and hungry college kid minding your own damn business.
And commenter Yuka here knows the real deal.
Until we are notified that the geese are open season (maybe in our dreams) the wise students of Lindenwood University will continue to protest on Yik Yak and through other social media. Over the past few weeks, numerous users online have "called out" the geese, and most commonly reference them as "assholes." One yakker who goes by the handle "unf*ckwittable" even provides almost daily updates on their situation between the geese. It started as hostile, but slowly said user was brainwashed by the idea of becoming "friends," with the enemy.
Looks like we lost a brave soldier in the fight against the geese. At least the rest of Yik Yak didn't fall victim to the black magic these animals have.
At the end of the day, one Yik Yak troll said it the best, "I pay more than all the geese combined! This is my campus!" Although these birds have a nest likely somewhere there is high traffic (i.e. the stairs next to Spellmann) we were still here first (back off, geese).
My advice? Either buck up and show them who's boss by walking right past them, or run like a baby back up the stairs and take ten plus extra minutes to get to your destination.
I'd pick the latter.
