Growing up, I wished to have a sister. I had two younger brothers by the age of seven and I spent my elementary days hoping and yearning for my mom would tell me I would have a sister. I wanted the sister that I could play dress up with, the sister that I could complain about my brothers to and the sister that I wanted to share secrets with but I never imagined. But the days went by and life went on. It seemed like I would never have that sister that I wished for, especially when I found out my parents were getting a divorce.

But there I sat, on my mom’s living room couch as she looked at us, me (18) and my brothers (14 and 11). And she said the words, “I’m pregnant.”

 At that moment, we were all stunned. It wasn’t that we didn’t want to have another sibling but it was with our stepfather, and we thought our family was done growing. In the beginning, I felt like all kids do when they find out they are having another sibling. I felt like I was going to be forgotten, like she was going to replace me. I was going to be leaving for college in a year and she was having a kid to replace me. It felt like I hated my little sister before she was born.

It was hard to accept that I wasn't my mom's only daughter anymore; it felt like I had to share the spotlight with someone else. I was finally learning what my brothers had felt towards each other. It was hard, knowing that someone else had what I had to offer to my mom. But somewhere between wanting to dislike my sister and being jealous of her, I fell in love with her.

I grew to love her as we grew older and we got to know each other. I spent the first five months of her life with her before I left for school. I didn’t miss her as much as I thought I should. But through breaks and weekends I’ve gotten to really know her to the point where she says, “Sissy is going to college” and “Yay, Sissy is home!” Hearing these words makes me tear up sometimes.

But it wasn't like that right away. My first long break home from college she wouldn't even look at me without crying. It was hard knowing that she didn't want to be around me. It took a long time, nearly all Christmas break to gain her trust but it didn't take long for our relationship to turn into what is now.

Yes, she is now three years old and our relationship isn’t ideal. It’s weird when I walk around and people give me those looks that say, “Wow, she’s so young to have a toddler.” She has taught me that life can be short, so don’t give in. She has taught me the beauty of patience. The most recent and important lesson she has taught me is: Letting your inner child out every once in a while is a good thing.