For the longest time, I was avidly against "The Bachelor" and "The Bachelorette." I hated the thought and idea of the show, and I would be visibly disgusted whenever anyone brought it up. If I saw someone in my house watching it, I would roll my eyes, cause a scene, and call it garbage. Because in my mind, that's what it was: garbage that shouldn't have been on television. The whole premise was stupid and ridiculous: people compete to fall in love and get married to someone, all in the matter of a few weeks. I didn't understand why people were so crazy about it, and if someone told me they were seriously into it, I would definitely judge that person.

Then something changed. Last year, my sister convinced me to sit down and watch the season premiere of 'The Bachelorette' with her. I figured I'd humor her. I'd sit and watch these people in this clearly staged and fake situation, and I'd make fun of them. I'd watch just the one, it would suck and make the brain cells flee my body, but then it would be over.

And there was my mistake.

The thing that got me, I think, was starting at the very beginning of the season. If I had jumped in a few episodes in, I don't think I would have watched another episode. But no. I got interested. I watched another one, and I got attached. I got favorites, and I got invested. I was becoming the kind of person that I couldn't stand, and I hated myself for it. In fact, I hated my sister for convincing me to watch it in the first place and for continually making me watch it with her every episode. I hate myself every time I watch an episode.

It's getting worse, too. Last year's season has come and gone, but this season came around, and I am right back in it again. I told myself I wasn't going to watch, that I was better than that, but alas, I am not. I am garbage. My sister, my mother, and I have watched it all this season. I've even watched some episodes on my own without them. That's what I have been reduced to, hungry for horrible reality television. And I know in my heart that even if everyone around me dropped the show immediately, I would continue watching until the end of the season, because I am invested and have a favorite and even though I know it's cheesy and fake the premise of love and happiness has sucked me in and I hate it.

In no way is 'The Bachelorette' good and quality television. In fact, it's quite the opposite. But it's just so easy to watch and easy to let yourself fall into it. I've stopped resisting, but that doesn't mean I'm happy about it. I'm still sucked in for the rest of the summer, but here's to hoping that next year I can break the cycle.