My college experience so far has been an interesting one. I love going to Iowa State, but like all colleges, it has its ups and downs. I've also found a new spirit animal in Titus Andromedon, from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. I've related to him more times than not because he is the level of petty I aspire to be.
Walking into Spanish 201 and the teacher only speaks Spanish.
Looking around to see if anyone else was as confused, but everyone seemed to understand her perfectly. Turns out the next day, almost NO ONE knew what was going on. Whew!
Thinking you had all your homework done, but the professor decided to assign another reading.
Sitting in class for only 10 minutes, but already falling asleep.
Why did I ever think I was a morning person? 8 AMs are NOT my friend.
And then 5 minutes later I want to just start yelling...
No, I do not know how to find the initial velocity of a football that was kicked. Isn't it zero?? Doesn't everything start with zero velocity???
There have also been Titus moments that related to my social life, such as...
Waiting to get into Thumpers even though I was a girl with a bunch of other girls.
Did I lose my mojo? Just kidding, did I ever even have mojo? I always let someone else do the talking and, soon enough, we got in.
Then getting in and having some rando trying to immediately dance with you.
I came out to have fun with friends, not to do some sort of bump & grind. So, umm, sir? Please don't touch the merchandise unless you're willing to buy it dinner first.
Or when someone simply says, "It was so nice to meet you!"
I think it would be so cool to meet me. Just once, so that I could relish in my awesomeness and be like, "Dang, I wish I was as cool as her. Oh wait, I AM!!"
And then there are those random times that Titus really just, got me. Ya know? Like...
When realizing you've been doing college all wrong.
And my two essays due tomorrow along with my statistics homework that didn't do itself? Sigh...
Seeing LARPing for the first time.
I come from a Native American reservation, so growing up there was no such thing as LARPing.
Asking grandma for money like...
She's always willing to spot me a twenty.
Chatting with your best friends about the gossip that happened over the weekend.
Yeah, yeah your jackets ruined, but also, who was it? Did you know them? Is it someone I know? I'm the nosiest of all nosers hehe and I love it.
So, Titus Andromedon, you beautiful, gay, black man. You understand that life is a tragedy and the only way to make it through is to be dramatic, but fierce. Thanks for the inspiration. I look forward to quoting you in my autobiography.
