College is the time in our lives when we hope to be involved in everything. These 4 years are filled with events, clubs, friends, enemies, sports, the arts, and academics. When it seems like there is no time to stop and smell the roses (or rain or cows or...), it seems we are asked to pick ourselves back up and run yet another marathon. As we grow through our college life, we learn some of the most important lessons and make the most important realizations about ourselves and our lives. Here are four of those life-changing realizations that helped get me through some of the hardest, most stressful parts of my college career.
1. Don't be afraid to say "No".
This was the hardest thing for me, and something I still find myself having to remember. When we are asked to complete 4 assignments after spending our day in class, choir at 3, meet with glee club at 4, dinner at 5, student government at 6, and rehearsal at 7, it can be hard to find a single moment to breathe. Telling others no can be difficult, but most often it is more about telling ourselves no. It isn't horribly drastic to say no to one extracurricular or another, or to play one sport instead of 3. You shouldn't be less proud of yourself for having to move things from today's "to-do" list to tomorrow's. There are opportunities every day and they will be abundant whether we choose to harp over our long list of responsibilities. Prioritize your time, don't wait till the last minute, and learn when to say no because your plate is already overflowing.
2. Stay Organized
Whether it is in your classes or in your dorm room, do your absolute best to stay organized. Most schools gift you a planner during orientation, and even if you don't think you need it, TAKE IT! You'll be surprised how often you'll search for something to write down your homework assignments or tests in. For me, my planner is in control of my entire life! I keep everything written down from tests and final dates to when I should do laundry and clean my room. When your schedule gets going, it can be almost impossible to think to do the most basic chores. Keeping notes in color or using highlighters for dates is also a great way to stay on top of what's coming next. If you're having trouble staying organized, try writing important information on sticky notes and putting them across your room or mirror; somewhere you'll see them often! Staying organized can be the hardest but most helpful skill to learn in college!
3. Find something that challenges or scares you
Life will not get any easier, and for most of us, our first "big kid job" will come as soon as we graduate! We will be forced to enter a work place that will challenge us every day. Before college, I ran from any opportunity that made me feel uncomfortable, and throught that if I wasn't good at something, I should just quit. Being in college, surrounded by people who are so talented at a vast array of things taught me that it is okay to be challenged. It is okay to not know what step comes next and to have to ask for help. By taking on adventures and activities that challenge me or make me face a fear has shown me so much about my spirit and drive. Talk to the guy you think you have nothing in common with. Befriend the girl on the team who's your biggest competition. Apply for campus positions that don't fall in line with anything you've ever done before. You'll be amazed at yourself and the talents you never knew you had!
4. Accept that friends come and go
This was one of the most difficult things I had to learn. Through high school, we do learn that people change, but for the most part, we all come back together again. In college, we learn to focus on our own lives and what is best for the direction we are heading in. I've learned that no matter what, my true friends will never leave me for something "better". My true friends show me respect and kindness even when we disagree or argue. It is okay, as we grow, to let go of toxic or deteriorating friendships. We are adults, and have just as much of a choice to decline a friendship as we do to welcome it. We develop morals, ethics, and standards. Deciding against a friendship or to take a step back doesn't make you a bad person. Choosing to end a friendship because of negativity will leave you so much better off in the end. Do what is best for yourself and you will be so much happier because of it. Let go of the stresses and pressures of other people. Keep in line with your morals and beliefs, and while we grow by seeing life through others eyes, learn to trust your own as well.
While college can be the one time in our lives we have complete freedom to do, say, and be whoever we choose, we also have to remember to stay grounded and begin to shape our lives. Saying "no" can free you up for some much needed, focused time. Staying organized can keep us out of the messiest situations and keep us on track for success. Engaging in something that challenges us or makes us fearful can broaden our horizons and open our eyes to new passions while accepting that friends aren't always forever does more for our well-being than our trips to the health center. Find what works for you and run with it. The next few years of your life will truly determine who you will become when the stresses and luxuries of college are all over.
