After three long years, or short in some sense of time, I find now a great time to reflect on what motherhood has taught me.
1. Time is no longer just about you.
Before Makayla, the only person I truly worried about was myself. I planned my schedule around myself and my job, what I wanted to aspire to in life. After Makayla, I plan my life around her. Everything I do, I do with her in mind, from planning my school schedule, working, hobbies, etc, she comes first and I wouldn't have it any other way. I may have sacrificed some things, but as long as she is happy and has a fulfilled life, that's all that matters.
2. Planning for someone else's future.
When it comes to Parenting, there's one thing specifically you have to worry about and that is their future. From the time they are born, you worry about what schools are in what district court in where they go to college how to pay for college if they'll go to college, so many things, and such a short span of time. Like I mentioned above, life is no longer about you it's about creating the best life possible and the best option that you can for this child.
3. There is no purer love than that of a child.
Makayla has taught me so many things in life. She has told me so many life lessons in this short three years that she has been on this Earth, than I learned in the nineteen years before you. She has taught me true unconditional love that has no preconceived conditions. She loves simply for the sake of love.
4. They will push you to the ends of your patience.
Ever had someone say your name or ask you the same thing a million times. Well, if so you know what it's like to be a mom. You want to be happy knowing that you are needed, or that they are exploring their curiosity. However, sometime since you just want some piece and quiet. Is that too much to ask? No, okay. But, although this may seem like complaining, I would not change her for the world.
Makayla has changed so much about my life, and although during the moment I may not always see the reasoning, ultimately it is worth it to be able to be called mommy. I love being a mother more than I could have ever imagined. Sometimes, I feel that I am nothing more than a failure as a mother, but she always surprises me. When she tells me she loves me, I'm her mommy, or I am her best friend, seeing her grow not only physically but mentally and in love, I know I am on the right path. I hope one day all these sacrifices I make and all the time that truly goes into raising a child, that she only accomplish her dreams and see what this great big world has to offer.
