My Life After Treatment
Start writing a post

Discharge day...

I arrived at residential treatment nearly two months ago. I felt utterly hopeless, deeply depressed, and highly unstable. Now, after many weeks of hard work, medication changes, difficult conversations, and education, it is time for me to return home.

In a previous article entitled, "My Life In A Mental Health Residential Treatment Center," I wrote about how what I expected it to be like, was nothing like how it actually was. Every single person was and continues to be so supportive and kind. I expected a prison, and instead, I found hope.

I have learned so much in the time that I have been here, and although I wish I could stay longer, I know that it is time for me to take the step down from residential and into a partial hospital program. Am I nervous or scared? Abso-f***ing-lutely.

And, at the same time, I also know that I can lean on this new program for help in my transition back to the outside world. I know I'm not alone, I know I have support. Residential has been neither a miracle cure for my illnesses nor is has it been an "easy journey" by any stretch of the imagination.

Every single day I woke up, I was the one who had to make the choice to get out of my bed, pay attention, and actively participate in groups. I was the one who controlled my treatment and I was the one who had to take the initiative.

The staff and treatment team can give you all the directions, suggestions, and tools you'll need; but at the end of the day, the only one who can choose to apply that knowledge is yourself. Only you can control the change you want to see. In short, you'll get out what you've put in.

45 days later...

It has been six weeks since I discharged from the residential program, and to be honest, this transition has been very difficult. Every single day has brought challenging situations, intense emotions, and discouraging thoughts. And yet, despite the rickety bridge beneath my feet and the raging storm above my head, I still push on ahead.

Treatment is scary, and making the decision to start treatment is even scarier. But perhaps the scariest thing of all is putting your blind faith in a process that marches to the beat of its' own drum. Placing trust in your treatment program and care team, and walking into the fire is such an intimidating task.

As I write this, I'm reminded of a very important lesson I was taught by one of my providers while in treatment. She told me, "vulnerability creates the opportunity for growth." Each day I go to my partial hospital program, I remind myself to be open and vulnerable and take a step outside my comfort zone. Progress isn't made while inside your bubble, it's made when you face that which is uncomfortable and scary.

The healing process has been slow, grueling, and often feels impossible; It's easy for me to dismiss how much I've gained since starting treatment. Remembering to celebrate each and every victory, no matter how small, is paramount to keeping myself on track.

I've had slip-ups, I've experienced regressions, and I've continued to struggle with the sickness inside my mind. And still, regardless of all the darkness that stood and continues to stand In my way, I remain defiant as I fight to live in its' ominous presence. Make no mistake, I will fight to the bitter end, whatever it takes.

Whatever it takes.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Olivia White

"The American flag does not fly because the wind moves it. It flies from the last breath of each solider who died protecting it."

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Separation Anxiety in Pets

Separation anxiety in pets is a real thing and recognizing the warning signs is important.

425857

Since March, Covid-19 required most of the world to quarantine in their homes. Majority of people ended up working from home for nearly five months. This meant pet owners were constantly with their pets giving them attention, playing with them, letting them out etc. Therefore, when the world slowly started to open up again and pet owners began returning to normal life work schedules away from the home, pet owners noticed a difference in the way their pet acted. Many pets develop separation anxiety especially during this crazy time when majority people were stuck inside barely leaving the house.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

The invention of photography

The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.

446200

The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Exposing Kids To Nature Is The Best Way To Get Their Creative Juices Flowing

Constantly introducing young children to the magical works of nature will further increase the willingness to engage in playful activities as well as broaden their interactions with their peers

1784264

Whenever you are feeling low and anxious, just simply GO OUTSIDE and embrace nature! According to a new research study published in Frontiers in Psychology, being connected to nature and physically touching animals and flowers enable children to be happier and altruistic in nature. Not only does nature exert a bountiful force on adults, but it also serves as a therapeutic antidote to children, especially during their developmental years.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments