We’ve all been through the hardships of a tough friendship. The once happy times you two once spent together long gone with no chance of them coming back. The memories start fading until neither of you care to remember them. The distance between the both of you starts growing until there’s nothing left to tie you two together. But you have your reasons and they might have theirs. So when is it okay to finally let go? When is it acceptable to finally realize that you’d be better off without their presence in your life?
I was always told that friends stick with each other through everything, and I believe it most of the time. But when are you allowed to take a step back and say enough is enough? The once healthy relationship is gone replaced with something tarnished and rotten. When is it acceptable to let go and say goodbye? To put your health and happiness before the relationship? When can you stop worrying about what people think about you for letting go of a long time friend? How do you deal with the guilt of realizing that maybe you made a mistake? Differences grow until a barrier is formed between two people and sometimes they don’t have the strength to knock it down and decide it’s better left standing.
Taking that first decisive step is one of the hardest things to do. You’re saying goodbye to a future with someone you once thought impossible to be apart from. There’s no checklist that needs to be completed during the process, instead taking lead with your gut feeling. Not every friendship you once though impossible to break will stand the test of time. People grow apart and lose touch. Maybe you realize you were never yourself when you were around them. Maybe they were supporting a bad habit you unconsciously hoped they’d help you overcome.
Sometimes you’re tricked by the feeling of regret when you end it. You begin to feel like you’ve done the wrong thing, like maybe you should go back, explain yourself and rekindle whatever is left to rekindle. You begin to believe that your friendship was an obligation you should've stuck with and let time solve. Learning to not doubt yourself was an important part in this process. Not letting yourself get tricked into stepping back into an unhealthy relationship is crucial.
Taking care of yourself and letting those thoughts take the back burner may seem like a mistake. But the weight lifted off your shoulders should only remind you of the freedom ahead of you. Putting yourself first in situations like these isn’t selfish and friendships shouldn’t feel like a life sentence. Maintaining a friendship takes work and dedication and its not until the disconnection slaps you in the face that you realize it’s taken a back seat. As difficult as it is letting go of a friend, you’ll realize how important it is for you to live in peace and harmony with your values.
