I will admit, I'm not a perfect person. I never claim to be, and I never will be. Sometimes I can be a handful. Every once in a while I need a hug and someone to tell me everything's going to be okay. I used to rely on you for that.
Whenever times got tough, whenever there was a bump in the road, whether that was a broken heart or the loss of a loved one, I waited to see if you would be there. When I say be there, I mean actually be there. More than just a text message or more than a simple how are you. I would have even accepted a 10-minute phone call to be honest.
I am not one to often ask for help, but you knew me well enough to know when something was wrong. I needed a friend to lean on, and you weren’t there. I was left waiting for someone who would never show up.
At the time, I was hurt and devastated, but I want to say thank you because when you weren’t there for me I realized who really was. When you weren’t there for me, I realized that I can rely on myself more than anyone else. When the phone calls started to turn to texts, and then the texts started to completely vanish I realized that I didn’t need you anymore.
I hope it’s because you found people that are a better fit for you than I was. I hope you love your new friends you’ve made in college, and I hope you still keep in contact with the ones who really meant something to you in high school. I was just somebody who walked through your life for a short time, and I’m glad that I did. I’m glad I got a chance to see you grow and develop, and I’m glad that I was there for you when you needed me. I’m sorry to say that you can’t say the same thing.
You helped me realize what I deserve in a friend. You helped me to realize that the people that I now call my friends are in it for the long haul. They would gladly meet up with me at midnight on a Thursday night to talk about whatever was on my mind.
If I gave you a call right now, what would you say? I don’t know anything about your life anymore, and I’m sure if we were to chat it would be a great one. I would be able to hear how you were and all of the adventures that have taken place in your life without me. I would love to have that phone call, and if you ever need someone to talk to know that I will be here. I will be waiting by my phone because that’s the type of person I am.
Thank you for teaching me what it takes to be that person, thank you for showing me how easy it is to lose a friendship, and thank you for showing me which ones are worth the effort. Until that phone call, I bid you farewell.
Sincerely,
The friend who wasn't enough
