Great Grandmother,

I have my reasons for not always being by your side.

I grew up learning to love my family. They're the people that are always there for me. The people I spend every holiday with. The people I go to when I need help.

Some people aren't as blessed when it comes to having a supportive family. That's supposed to make those who do, more appreciative.

I grew up having a very close relationship with my parents. They were my best friends, they still are. As for my brother, he's not so perfect but he's family and I'll always love him. As a growing teenager, I never got to see my cousins or my grandparents as often as those tight-knit families did. But that doesn't mean I didn't love them.

I never got to grow up in one town with the same group of friends. I was never able to go to my grandparents whenever I wanted. I was never the child to go to church every Sunday with my parents and grandparents and cousins. I only really saw them on holidays. We texted occasionally. Although, I never thought anything was wrong or different about my relationship with my extended family than anybody else's.

Time passed and I went off to college. All of my grandparents were getting older, but I've heard my parents talking about how their time is coming multiple times before. I was trying to get through my freshman year of college and while every little thing is extremely stressful, I remained selfish and only focused on myself. During that time, I lost someone close to me. You. At first, it didn't hit me too hard. I wasn't upset. Instead, my body was full of guilt.

I didn’t spend enough time with you. I didn’t go out of my way to make contact. I didn’t put in enough effort.

It was a wake-up call. People in your life go during the least expected times. It might not be convenient for you, but if it’s the right time, it’s a good thing.

I’m so sorry for not putting forth as much effort as you so rightfully deserved.

I love you.

S.H.