Dear Unnamed,

I have four weeks left. It sounds like a decent amount of time, but it's really not. It's not a lot of time before you come into my world and change it forever. I can't wait, but I'm also incredibly nervous. I thought maybe writing a letter to you would help.

1. I love you for nothing. You've done nothing to earn this love, and you will never have to. As long as you wake up, get up, and show up to life every day, you will be loved. And as long as you're showing up to life, I want you to know that lukewarm is not good enough. It will never be good enough. It doesn't matter what you do. It doesn't matter if you care about stamp-collecting or rocket science, as long as you care about it. I want you to love something so much that it sometimes feels like your chest is going to burst. To those who don't know passion, this will feel and look like destruction. But in order for a plant to grow, the root needs to break open to let the seed out. You must love something so much, you are willing to be destroyed for it.

2. The world is not fair. Everyone is going to spend the first years of your life trying to pretend this is not so. They will tell you that if you're kind, you will be rewarded. If you're good, you get a prize at the store. This is not the case. You will almost never be rewarded, and you shouldn't ever seek it. You will not get a prize for being good, rarely even a thank-you, but be good anyway. This will be your legacy. Be kind especially to those younger than you; go out of your way a little to prove to them the world really isn't that bad of a place.

3. If you go to science class, you will learn about skin and bones, and apes to people, and if you go to church, you will learn about God and the creation of the universe. Take none of these as truth. Believe nothing that anyone tells you unless it coincides with what you in your soul believe to be right. People will tell you what is right and wrong every day, but it is up to you to decide what you accept. Know that whatever you choose, I am behind you completely. Your beliefs are your right, and no one can bully you one way or the other.

4. When you are a baby, you will be dressed in frilly dresses and people will buy you Barbie dolls and cooking sets. This is gender performance. Do not let it dictate who you are. Remember that before you are a girl, you are a person. You are allowed to like and love anything in the world, and more importantly, you are allowed to love anyone in the world. It will always be okay to give someone your heart. The world needs more of those willing to do so.

5. You will be reminded of it everyday, but you should hear it again anyway. You will inherit a fight you were born to lose. It doesn't mean you have to; it just means you have to work twice as hard to win. It's not fair, it's simply not, but that's back to number two. You will grow up in a world where people don't give you the time of day for things you cannot control: your gender, your attentivity, your skin color. Your family will not look just like you on either side, and that may be confusing. You will grow up and at times feel completely lost, wandering aimlessly. When you wander, know that the point is you. You are here, you exist, and that is a privilege. Know that you are so incredibly loved that there will be books and paintings and poems made about you. Not because you will be born into a family of artists, but because you will be born into a family that knows you are the entire world and everything in it.

6. You are interesting. Believe that. You are astronomical: your mind is a galaxy and your thoughts are constellations. Each one holds a universe inside of it. Don't ever feel like you have to prove yourself to anyone. If you have to worry about keeping someone interested, they are not looking at your soul. They are not seeing you. Move on and let them go. Not everyone sits outside to watch a shooting star go by, no matter how brightly they burn.

7. You don't have to be productive to be a good person. Harry Potter marathons and hot chocolate and fresh baked banana bread can fix anything in the fall, and if you ever want a day like this, you call me up. We'll stay in our pajamas and argue about if Snape really was a good guy or not, then we will fall asleep on the couch. When we wake up, the world will be okay again.

8. Toxic people are not always evil. Sometimes they love you very much. This will not always be enough. Let go of anyone if they do not meet your standards. This is not heartless. This is survival.

9. People are going to tell you a lot about romantic love. It will be in movies and television shows and in the books you read. You'll see quotes like "someday someone will hug you so hard all your broken pieces will stick back together." This is not true. No one is putting you back together. Your journey is yours alone. If you fall apart, you must put yourself back together any way you know how, even if it means stitches and staples. Some day you may find love, and some day you may not. Your worthiness as a human being is not related to this in any way, shape, or form. You are not measured by how lovable or attractive someone else finds you. That reflects their own desires. It has nothing to do with you.

10. Live a life with your mind and arms open. You will encounter people in life who need your help. Your character will be what you do for those that can afford nothing in return.

11. You will be angry. When a boy pulls your hair or you get sent home from school for an unfair dress code, you will be so angry that your fists will curl at your sides and tremble. Your tongue will be forever marked by the lines where your teeth bit into it. It is okay to be angry. It is never okay to be cruel. When this feeling overtakes you: do not speak, do. Words borne of anger are useless. Actions borne of anger change the world.

12. It doesn't make you a bad person for not taking everything, or everyone, you're offered. You have to filter through the things life hands you. Someday someone may be willing to give all of themselves to you. When someone offers you a heart that you do not want, hold it with gentle hands, then carefully hand it back to them. You do not owe anyone your love or loyalty, but always be gentle with other people's souls. Don't ever take what you don't need just because you can.

13. It doesn't matter what happens after school. It doesn't matter how many loans you take out, or what job you may or may not get. Go to college. It will open your mind to things you would have never dreamed of considering. It will be stressful and impossible and life-altering. No matter what financial state you're in after the fact, your education is the one thing nobody can ever take away from you. You cannot take advantage of a person who understands what they deserve. Go to college.

14. Fall in love with the idea of being alive. Once you do this, nothing is impossible. Nothing is too hard.

15. The only day that will ever be wasted is a day you spend in your comfort zone. If you don't believe you can do something, go out and do it. Don't be afraid to prove yourself wrong. Make sure you're scared of something you do every single day.

16. Imagine a perfect world and who you would be in that world. Now be that person every single day. No excuses.

17. You are allowed to fail. You are not allowed to stop. Wake up, get up, and show up to life. As long as you do this, I promise you will be loved.

The last thing I want to say in this letter is that your voice, your story, and your heart is uniquely your own. Do not ever doubt the impact on the world you will bring with just that alone. Some people are luckier than others, but nothing happens without hard work. If there's something you want from life, you don't stop. You work until your life revolves around this desire.

People will try to tell you who you are your entire life, so let me be the first. You are a daughter, a sister, a niece. You are the beginning of the world.

And I promise to keep you safe.

Yours forever,

Auntie