Dear Professors,

When you first met me, I was a pretty good student. I always showed up for class, made sure my assignments were finished and was an active participator during class time. I felt like I had a lot going for me, and I couldn't have been more grateful for the things that were happening in my life. My depression didn't start acting up until halfway through junior year here at school. That's when I started spiraling downward and changed who I was, especially as a student. Being a senior now, and graduating soon, I want to take the time to explain what happened and hope you understand.

At the beginning of junior year, not much was different from the other years here prior. I was attending class regularly, and I had even moved into my sorority's house. While everything was fine, I felt anxious a lot more than usual. I didn't think a lot of it until I noticed it getting increasingly worse. It was getting to the point where I would be waking up feeling like my heart was beating out of my chest and having an anxiety attack at least twice a week. That's about the time my friend suggested that I go seek help.

I think seeking help was helpful for me in the long run, and I am thankful the campus offers free counseling to students. I encourage anyone feeling like they need help to go to their own campus counselors if their university offers it. However, while I was getting help, I was still feeling worse and worse, and I was struggling to understand why that was. I was sad for what seemed like no reason, I was sleeping all of the time, I had multiple crying outbursts, I genuinely could not get out of bed and I had active suicidal thoughts. It took a lot of coercing from my counselor to even tell my mother, but once I did, I got the medication I needed that really helped get me where I am today.

Now, I really wanted to write you a letter because I never wanted you to think that I did not care about school or that I hated your classes. At the time, it was a huge accomplishment just to get out of bed. I did not know how to deal with all my emotions, and because of that, I couldn't even figure out how to motivate myself to do the simplest tasks. I neglected my responsibilities, and I am aware that is my fault and I am sorry. I still have my lows, and there are still days that I can't get out of bed, but it is a process and it is getting better each day.

I want to thank you for your patience you have had with me these past two years, especially from seeing the student I used to be to where I am now. I want to tell you all how much I have appreciated how you have all seen my potential and never gave up on me. Teachers like you are why I would always recommend a small college instead of a big college because of the level you all have of understanding and genuine caring of your students here. If it weren't for you always believing in me, I don't think I would have grown as much as I have. Thank you for never giving up on me.

Signed,

A student with depression