I have spent years hiding away. I have spent most of my own time judging myself, hating myself, despising my body and my voice and everything else. Why can't you be skinnier? Why can't you be prettier? Why can't you be funnier? Why can't you be more talented? Every single day becomes a judging spree of what looks wrong and what I could have done differently to look better. I want to be better, I want to be happier, but I often find myself not being able to. Why, why do I do this to to myself? Why do I make myself feel horrible?

It feels like a trap. Like I purposefully hurt myself so no one else can. Why can't you change? Why can't you just be normal? Every single day, day in and day out. It's becoming exhausting, and I know I can't handle the stress I put on myself, yet I continue to do it. It is as if I drown myself in hopes that maybe- just maybe- everyone else wouldn't stare. That maybe everyone else wouldn't laugh at me....

I'm writing this letter to myself in hopes for a change. I'm writing this letter as a way to force myself to realize I'm worth more than how I treat myself. So, without further hesitation, here we go...

Dear Myself,

You are incredibly harsh on yourself. You judge yourself, and you are your own worst enemy. Yes, you may have a quirky fashion and yes, those clothes may not always fit well. Yes, you may not have clear skin or perfectly straight and shiny hair. But you are also incredibly self-reliant. You are smart and clever in ways you may never truly understand. Your independence and creativity shines brighter than any star in the night sky. Your ability to lead and to go above and beyond are appreciated and loved. All these qualities rank far above your looks and your laugh, far above your weight and body shape. You are amazingly talented and your soul is pure. Do not give up on yourself. Do not doubt yourself. Do not lose yourself. You are perfect in every way that counts.

Love,

Your Much More Confident Self