Hey, you-- yes, you. It’s been awhile, and I’m glad that it has been. If someone had told me that I would say that to you two and a half years ago, I would have said that they were crazy. A lot has changed since you and I last talked, and for the better. How’s your new girl doing? I’m sure she is doing just as well. I would ask how you are, but it seems that I no longer care.
You know, I thought for the longest time that I needed you to see how wonderful my life was without you, and just how much better I was doing that you. Especially how much He loves me, and how very much I love Him. It has taken me time, but I realize that I no longer need that, and I never should have thought that I did. I don’t need you to see what my life is like now and how truly better I am doing without you. I think you knew that I was better off without you, and that’s why you left. I was too much for you, and you knew that you would destroy me. So you did it, and at the time, I thought that I was the one who would suffer.
As you can see, (or not see- that’s fine, too) I am no longer suffering. Aside from the two rough weeks that preceded your destruction, I have been doing great. As for you, you are forever indebted to your failure to be who you said you would be. For the rest of your life, you’ll have to remember the disgusted look that I gave you the day after you cruelly texted to end things; you’ll have to remember my kindness, and how I would have never hurt you like you hurt me; you’ll have to live with the blank stare that I have as I drive by your house, as if I had never set foot on that doorstep. You will always remember how deeply I cared, and how I no longer do. But, if you don’t remember all of these things, that’s fine, too.
All of my compassion I now give to Him: a man that deserves such love. It may seem weird writing this to you after all of this time, but I don’t think that there is a time frame for self-expression like this. While it may seem like I am placing blame on you, I truly am not. This is a thank you letter to you, more than anything. Thank you for screwing up and teaching me exactly what love shouldn't be. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Because now, I have Him: the truest, living, proof that everything truly does happen for a reason.
