Dear Ex-Best Friend,
I am, for the record, still pretty mad at you. And yes, I may have been the one who spread the rumor of your pregnancy, and offered someone money to trip you when you wore the heels I BOUGHT YOU to prom, but still there are a few things you should know.
While that one fight set us apart for the rest of our lives and made me realize that I couldn't ever trust you again, there are still times when I think of how we used to be, before the fighting. I could not get enough of you. We were, in many ways, the exact same. We seemed inseparable because we were and even though no one else understood us sometimes, I always found comfort in the fact that you did, and always would. We had our own language, marched to the same beat, and even hated the same people. You were, in so many ways, my rock, and I knew this was the closest thing I would ever get to a sister.
I can still remember first meeting you in the bleachers of our high school football game. While we were being introduced by our mutual friend, I was thinking "Yikes, she already seems like a b***h", but it wasn't until that one special moment when that girl decided to storm across the bleachers like she owned them and you uttered those perfect words: "Ugh, I can't stand her." I no sooner broke from my shell and accepted this best-friendship opportunity given by the Gods with "Omg, me too." It was then that our eyes locked and I knew, we both knew, a friendship had just begun.
It started out small, with a few frequent rants about how we just couldn't stand that girl, and then things just kept building. We started going to lunch together, having frequent homework sessions, and texting a lot. Soon enough, our mutual friend became the third wheel. It wasn't our fault, we were just two innocent soulmates embarking on the friendship of the century. And then...it happened.
Tragedy struck in my family and I just didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't want to tell anyone; except you. I told you and you were there every day, making sure I was okay, bringing me that Half-Baked Ben and Jerry's whenever I wanted and best of all, you kept me happy. And after that, everything we went through, we did together. My pain was your pain, and your boyfriend was essentially my boyfriend considering I was the author of your texts 9/10 times. We shared it all and there was no one I would rather have.
But just like everything else in this world, things change, people change. We never grew apart, if anything we grew closer and closer. That is, until the fight happened. Before that day, the most we ever fought about was whether the shirt I was wearing was actually yours, or if you had just borrowed it too many times. But not that day. It was a fight we maybe knew would come but thought we might somehow get past. We never did. And just as the foundation shakes, there goes the entire home. We made our friends take sides, we talked bad about each other more than anything else, and even made our parents believe that the friend you once were was actually a huge lie. But, you know as well as I do, it was all out of anger and pain. I was hurt. I missed you, I was angry at you, I didn't want to talk to you and yet in the midst of all of the pain, it only made me need you more.
It's true what they say, senior year of high school can take a toll on your friendships. Still today I think maybe if we had gone back for another year, we might have made up, but we didn't. We went to different colleges, met different people, and even established entirely new social circles. I can't say it wasn't super hard, though. Not only was it so different from high school, but there was no one here even close to the friend you were to me. You are, to this day, irreplaceable.
So now, all there is to say is that I'm sorry, I miss you, I'm still mad at you, but I will always love you, and I'll still keep you in my prayers.
Not so sincerely, I hope you end up catching something,
Your Ex-Best Friend
