Dear Misunderstood,
You struggle to be yourself sometimes, fearing that you will be come across as someone other than yourself. You tend to face your own battles and struggles, like everyone else, and feel as though no one truly understands who you are. Perhaps not no one, you still feel as though your quirky personality, fears, difficulties or hobbies set you apart from the masses a majority of the time. If this describes you now or at any point in your life, I am here to tell you that it is okay, and that more people struggle with this than you might think.
Those who seem as though they have it all together, the total package if you will, with a ton of friends, great looks, a significant other, athletic abilities and straight As, have times where they feel as though they are not fully understood too. Having the stereotype of "perfect" being placed upon you is not only stressful but inaccurate. You know better than anyone that you are far from perfect. You most likely feel that you are perceived as a snob, an overachiever, a perfectionist or even fake. The comments or glares you receive from others can make you feel unaccepted, just like those who believe their life is in shambles.
For those who enjoy hobbies that fall into negative "clique" statuses, such as theater, reading, art or video gaming, you too feel that though you are not accepted by a larger crowd and lack confidence even within a group of people with varying interests. You are concerned with how you are perceived when not in your element, wondering how you can prove to others that you do not just sit in your room like a hermit but enjoy activities and hanging out with friends like everyone else.
If you are one of the millions of individuals who struggle with self-esteem, disabilities, fears, depression or social anxiety, you may feel as though you are seen as different by even those closest to you. You fight your own daily battle and fear others are judging your actions or behaviors that come along with these difficulties. Friends don’t understand why you don’t want to hang out or participate in a particular activity. Your family doesn’t understand why you shut yourself in your room all day, and significant others may not understand why you “need space.”
Some of you probably feel as though your life is falling apart, and you can’t get it together. Your friends and family don’t get why you cannot remember to do your homework or show up late to class and events, but you feel as if your head is in a million places at once. You may be involved in too many activities or friend groups or may just be in a little bit of a rough patch, but do not worry what others think because they struggle too.
To those who feel like you don’t belong in just one place and have friends and family that span across different genders, ethnicities, beliefs, hobbies or interests, I understand you may also feel misunderstood. You are constantly torn between different friend groups and may even be judged for being friendly with many types of individuals. You get along with the athletes, the artists, the overachievers, the slackers and those struggling, but you sometimes feel lost in your own identity. You try to be kind to everyone, but your kindness can often be seen as two-faced or fake.
The bottom line is that you are not alone; everyone struggles to feel acceptance and gratification in who they are, while searching for those who fully understand you and what you have to offer. Those friends and/or significant other will come along, just continue to be you and lessen your judgement toward others. Remember not to judge a book by its cover and to be kind to all, for everyone is facing some battle you know nothing about.
Sincerely,
Your Fellow Misunderstood
