Dear Lauren,

I know you think about me a lot. I know you hate being you right now. I know you wish you could grow up and out of your awkward preteen body and become a miracle of a social butterfly.

I also know that you have no idea what these next few years will do to you. I wish I could help you, but I know that if I do, you will learn nothing. You will not grow into me, and though it will not be easy, these are lessons you need to learn. They will hurt like a bitch, and nights spent wondering why you exist at all will not be uncommon. They will also allow you to revel in every moment of bliss you encounter and tuck precious moments away like treasures inside your memory. Each time you taste the sugary-sweetness of happiness, you will learn to savor it more and more.

No, I cannot help you. But there is another person that needs both of our experiences combined, so that she can live a better life than we've led. She deserves that much. Any advice that we could possibly give will help her, if only by a small amount.

So...

Dear baby sister/the not-so-runt of the litter/princess/boss,

I know you. I have watched you grow from the time you were born to now, cringing as you discover makeup and begin to look years older than me. I know you strive to be your own person. You are independent, strong-willed, fierce, and one tough bitch (I say that with all the love in the world). I wish I could be more like you. More than anything, my wish for you is that you continue to grow into the amazing woman I know you are already transforming into.

Don't harbor hatred. Holding grudges hurts you more than it hurts anyone else. Bitterness does to your heart what cancer does to the cell; all it does is consume the healthy parts of you, forging strength while stifling any ability you have to fight it.

Don't let people make you feel worthless. When you give someone that kind of power over you, you are allowing them to take control of your life. Your life is a vehicle; you will have passengers, some fleeting and some recurring. You can let people help you through the tough times and take the wheel when you falter, but whatever you do, do not let them keep it for themselves. You should be in the driver's seat in your life.

Do not let a man lay his hands on you. You are not an object, and you should never be made to feel as such. If you want to avoid me kicking the crap out of whoever that unfortunate boy may be, you'd better put that kid in his place. I know you are perfectly capable of defending yourself. I laugh to myself every time I think of that jerk in your class making a comment about your Batgirl Halloween costume, and how he thought calling you "Bat-whore" would be a good idea; I definitely don't think he saw it coming when you responded with a slap to the face. Now, now, I don't condone violence... I need to be a good role model, you know (applauds silently in the background)...

Finally, be confident. I don't want you to look in the mirror and see things that you feel need to be corrected. God made you perfect, girl, and you are your own brand of perfect. Your teenage years will not be kind to your self-esteem, but I will always be here to reassure you that you are beautiful inside and out.

I want you to know what I didn't know when I was your age. I want you to experience the most joyful adolescence you can possibly have, and I want to help you get there. I love you so so much.

Your big sister/butthead/red velvet cupcake/sissypoo,

Lauren