She is smart, beautiful, caring, and selfless. She used to be happy too, until you decided that she was not worth the truth. She's my best friend. The one person I know has my best interest at heart and the one person I can always count on to make me laugh. She used to be that person for you too.
Throughout your journey with her, I came to know you as somewhat of a friend. I liked how happy she was with you, and I supported her relationship with you because I saw how excited she was. You were her first love, her first relationship, but too quickly you became the first person to make her scared to love again. You may have been honest with her for a little while, but if I had to guess I would say most of your time spent with her you told little white lies. Those little white lies became really big lies, and then the biggest one of all that crushed her. She looks for the good in everyone and everything, which is one of the many amazing things about her. In this situation, it only hurt her.
She wanted to believe the best in you so when she was faced with anything else, she chose to ignore it. She let so many things slide just to keep you in her life. She didn't voice her opinions or let you see how much the things you did or didn't do hurt her because you didn't let her be open with you. When she told you how she felt, you shut down and wouldn't listen. So she stopped opening up. She pretended everything was great between you two, even when I knew her heart was breaking.
As her best friend I wanted to be supportive, but it took everything in me not to confront you and tell you how selfish you were. I didn't because she would have been upset with me, but now I can tell you. She trusted you and allowed you to come into her life when you didn't deserve it and all you gave her in return was betrayal. Maybe it's because you weren't really ready for commitment or you just had other options, but she was always the best option and you never chose her. She went out of her way to make you happy and treat you better than any girl ever would, but you chose to be unfaithful. You shared the love that was only supposed to be for her with other people, and you had no remorse... until you got caught of course.
I was there with her while she cried and asked why, and I didn't have answers. I wanted to help her, but I couldn't. I wish I could understand why you would hurt her and lie to her over and over again, but my only answer is that you simply didn't care. You were getting unconditional love from her, and attention from everyone else and that's what you needed. Your insecurities make it hard for you to only be with one person. I just wish she would've known before she let you in.
My best friend sees the good in everyone and everything, so even now after everything she only says good things about you. She still loves and cares for you because what she felt was real. She will struggle to move on and find herself comparing everyone else to you because in her eyes, you were all she needed even when we all knew she deserved so much more. I hope you think of her with good thoughts and feel remorse and regret for the way you treated her. More importantly, I want to thank you. You showed her how strong she is and you gave her the motivation to love herself and make herself happy again. You may have broken her heart, but you didn't break her. She will be okay and she will find somebody that will give her all of the love you didn't. I can't wait for that day. I don't want to get even, I don't want to hurt you, and I don't hate you, but I do feel sorry for you. You missed out on the greatest love you could have when you hurt her, and you'll have to always live with that.
As for her, she's still smart, beautiful, caring, and selfless, but now she's strong too.
