As I write this, I am on the highway from my town to yours, a 250-mile stretch of road. It’s your 11th birthday, and you don’t know I’m coming. It’s weird, honestly. You’re 11 years old now, and this is the first birthday party of yours I’ve ever been to. For that matter, I didn’t even know you or our other brother even existed until last year.
Here’s a little backstory:
I was born in June of 1997 to a beautiful woman. She was 17 at the time, and knew she couldn’t care for me the way she wanted me to be cared for. She made a difficult decision that most people will never have to even consider. Before I was even born, she put me up for adoption. I was adopted by the most precious people I’ve ever known, my mom and dad. They couldn’t have a child, and they had looked into adoption for a while. I’m genuinely grateful that I was the kid they adopted and not someone else. Mom and Dad, I love you beyond words. Nothing will ever change how much the two of you mean to me.
My adoption was a “private” adoption, but I’m genuinely not even sure what that means. All I know is my birth mother received photographs of me up to the first year, and then contact stopped. I wouldn’t be allowed to have any contact with her until I turned 18. This leads to a whole other story, but basically everything worked out when I turned 18 and I met my birth family. Since then, I’ve spent a few weeks here and there with them, went on little day trips, etc. I don’t see them very often, but nonetheless, they are in my life enough for me to go and stay with them and we are very close.
One thing I’ve wanted my whole life is a little brother. Never a little sister—a little brother. Let’s just say I was a snoopy little kid, and I found some stuff that may or may have not led me to my birth mother’s Facebook page, and I may or may not have found a picture of two young boys that kind of looked like me. Of course I couldn’t be sure, but it was kinda cool to say the least. I later (but before I was 18) found out that I had two younger brothers. Not one, but two. Then, when I turned 18, I got to meet them. They were 13 and 10 when I met them. The elder is now 14 and the youngest just turned 11 a week ago.
End backstory. Sorry it was so long.
I’m headed to your birthday party right now. We’re halfway there. You don’t know I’m coming. I’m so excited. I love seeing you. You are seriously one of the few lights of my life. 11 years old may not seem like much to you, but you’ve got no clue. I was eight when you were born. You’ve been alive for over half of my life and I have only known you a year now. Yet, somehow, I feel like I’ve not missed a single second of you growing up, let alone a whole ten years. I am your big sister, whether you like it or not (although I know you like it, you love me, duh).
It may not be such a blessing though, because I’m not just a friend. As your big sister, I vow to look out for both you and our other brother in every possible way. Yes, this means that I will let you know what I think of your girlfriends when you get older. I will tell you when I think you are making a poor decision. I will do everything in my power to keep the two of you out of trouble and away from some of the pain I have felt by not being such a smart cookie. Both of you could move mountains if you set your mind to it. You have the purest, most innocent souls I’ve ever encountered and I hope to God you stay that way for a long time.
When I’m not around, look out for one another, especially at school. Kids can be mean, and I can tell you from experience that I’d love to have had a sibling to stand up for me when I was being picked on. Let your love for others show. Try to always be kind and smile; smiles and laughs truly are contagious (especially yours). Don’t let negative people get to you. Anyone who never has anything nice to say isn’t worth your time anyways. Stay true to yourselves and tell your mom and grandma you love them simply because you can. They’re great women and I’m sure they’d love to hear you boys tell them that for no reason at all (a hug wouldn’t hurt, either). Try your hardest to succeed in life, and never give up on one another or yourselves.
I know advice from your sister is the last thing you want to hear, but I’m not sorry. I am so grateful to have you boys in my life. I love you both and will forever want what’s best for you. Thank you for loving me as much as I love you.
I’ll see you soon.
