A Letter To My Roommate As She Goes Abroad

A Letter To My Roommate As She Goes Abroad

I'm going to miss you, but I'm so excited for you.
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When you first told me that you were thinking of going abroad for a semester I was pretty devastated. How would I survive an entire semester without my roommate and best friend? I’ve never had to face the stress of college without you by my side, keeping me laughing and smiling through it all. You have been there for me since day one of college, and I feel extremely lucky that I was able to find someone who means so much to me--in my random roommate of all people. So, although I’m not looking forward to the next semester without you here, you know I’m wishing you all the best on this adventure.

I hope this experience is everything you want it to be and more. I hope you have the time of your life, learn even more about yourself, continue to grow into the amazing person you are, and embrace every moment of it. I know you won’t waste a minute of this journey and will keep me fully updated at all times. I cannot wait to hear all of the great stories you will have from being abroad; all that you’ll learn and get to do. I’m jealous that you get to do this, but I’m even more jealous of the people that will get to enjoy your company for those months. They should realize how lucky they are to have you around.

I really don’t tell you enough how much I appreciate everything you do as my roommate and friend. You help me make tough decisions, support my decisions even when they’re clearly stupid, make me laugh until it hurts and I’m sure I should have formed at least one ab, listen to me talk about all my problems, give me the best advice, and laugh at all my ridiculous jokes.

I love that we talk about anything and everything under the sun. I love that you’re always up to dance like a fool with me. I love that we understand each other’s humor and can convey things to one another with just a look.

I never thought in a million years that my random roommate from freshman year would become such an important person in my life. You know everything about me, and I’m not just saying that, you really know everything. So I guess what I’m trying to say here is, thank you. Thank you for being my person. Thank you for staying up late into the night just talking, thank you for always looking out for me, and most importantly, thank you for being the amazing person that you are.

I want to wish you the best of luck on your journey. I know right now it’s all very intimidating and scary, but I know you, and I know you’ll make the most of it and have the time of your life. I’ll be stalking all your posts on social media and patiently awaiting all the updates I expect from you the whole time you’re gone. I’m so sad that you’re leaving me, but I’m more excited for how incredible the semester is going to be for you.

I’m going to miss you like crazy, and I wish you the very best of luck!

Cover Image Credit: Olivia Sun

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I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it

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Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

Cover Image Credit: wordpress.com

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Finding Your Niche In College Starts With Finding You

Attempting to be someone you are not for the sake of having company only hurts you in the long run.

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Transitioning to college is hard enough, but trying to find a place where you feel "at home" can make this time even more stressful. Here are some tips on how to find that place/group of people that make you feel like sunshine.

I have always felt a little out of place wherever I went, but it wasn't until college that I realized that this feeling was so special and more people should capitalize on their differences rather than conforming to a certain mold. Transitioning to college and finding your place among so many people can be very overwhelming. The added stress of attempting to be someone you aren't for the sake of having company adds a whole other layer to this problem. The easiest thing for me to do in any situation like this is trying to make the setting a little smaller. One of the most obvious ways to do this on a college campus is by getting involved!

It is inevitable that within the first few weeks of the semester at any college, there will be an organization fair. This is a chance to scope out all that your school has to offer! Chances are there will be some type of group or club that lines up with your interests. Most college campuses have extracurricular opportunities ranging from social sororities and fraternities, professional ones, intermural sports, vocal groups, and so many more. You are more than likely going to find some type of organization that you can call home if you seek them out. Joining an organization is such an easy way to interact with people with similar interests. An interest can bring two completely different people together and create some beautiful friendships. It is situations like this where it is important to be your authentic self and mingle with those you share something with.

That being said, finding your place in college isn't always about being involved. Getting involved on campus is just one of the simplest ways to start. There are so many other opportunities on campus to meet people whether it be among others in your residence hall, people in your classes, or just people you find yourself stumbling upon! Finding people to spend your time with is easy; however, you should make it a point to surround yourself with people who bring you up.

Once you have a set group of people that you find yourself spending time with, it is important to pay attention to the way you feel when you're around them. If you find yourself feeling bad about yourself or get the impression that you need to change something in order to "fit in," chances are the people you're around are not the best for you or your self-esteem. It is important to surround yourself with people who allow you to feel comfortable in your own skin. That being said, you also want people who encourage you to make good decisions and help you reach your goals. People who encourage toxic behavior in your life might be fun in the short term, but in the grand scheme of things, you need to be surrounded by people with your best interest in mind. Essentially, surrounding yourself with people who influence you to be your best self is one of the best decisions you can make short and long term.

The key to all of this is being conscious of your own feelings and needs. Pay attention to who reaches out to you to hang out. Notice the ones who pay attention to you as you speak when it feels like no one is listening. More than anything, be conscious of who you're with and where you're at when you experience moments of pure happiness. Life is too short to waste your precious time on people who don't build you up. Wouldn't you rather spend your time with more moments of pure joy than self-hate? Start living for you!

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