To The Boy Who Blew The Stop Sign And Ended My Friend's Life

To The Boy Who Blew The Stop Sign And Ended My Friend's Life

You don’t know me and I don’t know you, but I do know of you. You were with my friend when he was passed on to the Lord.

Holly Tweed

Dear Ryan*,

My name is Holly. You don’t know me and I don’t know you, but I do know of you. You were with my friend when he was passed on to the Lord. We just started getting close these last couple years and especially this last one, Summer of 2014. He was such a friendly and amazing kid. It was devastating to hear that he had passed away. It is something that I will never forget.

You are probably wondering why I am writing this to you. I am writing this because I feel like the Lord is calling me to: to give you the word that you are forgiven.

Everyone keeps asking me why I’m not mad at you and blaming you, telling me that I should be. I’m not. I don’t blame you for the death of either of them and I’m not mad. They say, “Well, he didn’t have his license. He was the driver. It was his fault because he didn’t stop.” Yes, you failed to stop and you made the wrong decision to drive without a license with others in the car, but that doesn’t mean that I blame you or that any of us should.

You didn’t mean for this to happen; this wasn’t your intent. You didn’t plan to go out and take the lives of two kids. It was simply nothing more than an accident.

Why should we make you feel more hurt than you already are? You lost a teammate, classmates, and you were there to witness it all. You are hurting, in pain, grieving like all of us, if not more.

I’m not mad at you and I don’t blame you because I know that you didn’t plan for this to happen. It was an accident; accidents happen to all of us. They happen to EVERYONE. This one just turned out for the worst.

Honestly, I am very happy that you are still alive. It is one less person that this world lost. One less family to grieve the loss of their child. One less person that the school and community lost. If we think losing two children is bad, imagine losing three. That is plenty of more people who do not have to feel the pain of the loss of a family member or friend.

I wrote this so you know that I have given you forgiveness. And I know you might not think that it is very much to hear this from someone you don’t know, but I did lose a very good friend, a part of me, I lost him. I am in pain, suffering, agony, and grief. Still, for some people, it is hard or impossible to forgive the driver of an accident.

I know it was NOT your intent and I hope that you learn something from this. This was all of God’s plan.

I saw you at his funeral, I saw you touch his casket, and I saw you walk back to your car. I am sorry for the loss of your two friends and of your teammate. You are forgiven, Ryan, and I am forever grateful that you are still alive.

I will continue to pray for you and your family. I hope this whole accident has touched your heart and helped you learn a lesson.

With many prayers and lots of forgiveness,

His friend

*Names changed for privacy

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